If Music Be The Food Of Love
by Sweedledome
Summary: Bechloe in many different ways across many different universes because, let's face it, they're always going to end up together aren't they? (Series of one shots)
1. Never Stop

_**Okay, quick author's note. Basically this is going to be a compilation of Bechloe one shots, most of which will be inspired by music. Probably not all but most. Some will be happy, some will be sad, some will be AU, some will be canon. It's whatever story comes to me when I listen to a song so each one shot will be different. I've started off with an incredibly fluffy one because I didn't want to get too intense on the first chapter so...yeah, prepare for epic fluff.**_

I also want to apologise for any random formatting, I don't actually have Word on my computer at the moment which means i'm using their online version of Word on SkyDrive which, while incredibly useful, does like to screw things like paragraphs up. A lot.

This chapter was inspired by 'Never Stop' by Safetysuit and 'Still Into You' by Paramore.

* * *

Never Stop  
  
Chloe turned her head to look curiously at the woman who had just been singing softly into her ear as they rocked from side to side on the dance floor.

"Beca, what on earth are you doing?"

"Uhh...singing to you?"

"Why?"

"It's romantic. You like romantic."

"I like you and I know you don't like to serenade, what's with the sudden mushiness?"

"Well sorry for trying to be romantic on our wedding day. I'll be cynical and bitter next time."

"There's not going to be a next time. This is forever. Now if you don't mind, I'd like to enjoy my first dance with my wife without her looking pained at an attempt to do something romantic." Beca's heart warmed at the knowledge her wife was okay with Beca just the way she was, awkward failed attempts at romance and all. She pulled her head back just enough to gaze into Chloe's eyes.

"You know, I don't think I'm ever going to get used to you Chloe Beale." Beca mused.

"That's Chloe Mitchell to you." Chloe said, raising an eyebrow.

"Mitchell?"

"Never was very fond of double barrel names. I hope that's okay. I like the idea that it lets everyone know I'm yours." Beca just smiled.

"I get to call you my wife, everything is a little more than 'okay' right now." Unable to hold back any longer, Beca leaned into capture the lips of her wife...her wife. She did it, she finally got to call Chloe hers for good and she had never been so happy.

Beca chuckled as she heard the chorus of wolf whistles come from the crowd of friends and family watching them when they didn't separate from the kiss, even Stacie had managed to reappear from the broom closet followed by a very rumpled looking waiter to see the happy couple dance their first dance in a long line of many.

Everything was perfect. In that moment Beca made a silent vow to herself that she would never stop trying to keep Chloe happy, she would always try to keep Chloe looking at her the way she was right now, eyes shining with happiness and a smile so bright it was a wonder Beca didn't go blind.

"Beca?"

"Hmm?"

"Are you okay sweetie? Your heart's beating really fast." Chloe frowned at Beca's chest where she placed her palm flat above Beca's thudding rib cage.

"I think that's just you. It's odd, you'd think after all this time it would have calmed down some wouldn't you?"

"Really? Are you sure you're not just nervous?" Chloe looked down at her shoes, her voice suddenly small.

"What do I have to be nervous of?" Beca asked, bemused by her wife's sudden change in behaviour.

"I don't know, maybe you thought you made the wrong choice or something."

"Chloe, look at me right now." Lifting her head so she made eye contact with Beca once more, Chloe had to smile at the emotion she saw there.

"I could live a thousand different life times and meet you a thousand different ways but no matter what, one thing would always stay the same, I would always choose you. I'm never going to stop choosing you, or marvelling at the fact you chose me to be honest, I mean...sometimes I just look at you and...it's like everything just makes sense again and it makes my heart kick into overdrive.

I sometimes have to wonder if you're real, if it's actually possible for someone to exist who can make me feel this way all the time. When we first started going out I thought that it was just excitement or nervousness or whatever and I figured it would fade after a while. It hasn't though, it's just how you make me feel. All the time."

"Wow...not bad Mitchell." Chloe laughed, blinking back tears.

"What?"

"For a self professed romance hater, that was a pretty mushy speech you just gave there." Chloe chuckled.

"I guess you just bring it out in me." Beca joined her in her laughter, noticing for the first time that other couples had joined them on the dance floor and they were now in the midst of a sea of people. One particular couple made her snort with laughter, hurriedly tapping her wife on the shoulder, Beca was quick to point them out. "Chlo, Chloe, you have to look over there!"

"Where am I looki-oh my god!" Over in the seated section was a giggling Aubrey happily straddling a terrified looking Jesse.

"I know right? Aca-believe it!" Eying her still laughing wife suspiciously, Chloe asked "Beca. What did you do to Aubrey?"

"Nothing." Beca replied, trying to avoid Chloe's stare.

"Beca. Answer me." Oh shit, there was no arguing with that tone of voice.

"I may or may not have been adding vodka to her drinks since the reception started."

"Beca!" Chloe cried, slapping Beca's arm none too gently.

"Sorry Chlo, but she was getting really stressed out about the flower arrangements being wrong or some crap like that so I thought she could do with some...loosening up."

"Well I suppose those two might finally stop dancing around each other now and actually do something about those toners."

"See? I had it all planned out."

"Sure you did honey, besides, I'm pretty sure it's tradition for the best man and the maid of honour to get it on at the wedding."

"Hey! Jesse is not best man, he's a man of honour." Beca huffed indignantly.

"What's the difference?"

"If I have a best man, that means I'm the man in the relationship."

"Well...you sort of are..." Chloe smiled hesitantly at Beca.

"What? I am not!"

"You're the big spoon."

"So?"

"You always pull out my chair for me if we go out to dinner."

"I'm just being polite!"

"And you always insist on paying."

"Well excuse me for trying to treat my girlfriend.

"Wife. Not to mention there's the door thing."

"Okay, I can promise you now, no matter how much you joke about it, I'm never going to stop holding the door open for you."

"Oooh, look at you being all chivalrous."

"Not really, gives me the perfect excuse to stare at your ass every time." Chloe just smiled and shook at her head at her now smirking wife before leaning in to give her another kiss of many that night.

* * *

Beca stifled a yawn as she stumbled into the kitchen, another late night at the station coupled with the stress of trying to keep the surprise she had planned for their five year wedding anniversary from Chloe was taking it's toll. She was exhausted and she barely got to see Chloe lately with her never ending shifts at the hospital.

It was tough, but they were slowly gaining the money they needed to start a family, something Beca had never thought she'd want but it was becoming an increasingly attractive proposition. Stopping suddenly, Beca took in the sight in front of her. There, leaning against the stove was Chloe wearing nothing but an oversized t shirt with a mug of steaming coffee in her hands. Sunlight streamed in through the window, bathing Chloe in a warm glow that seemed to make every strand of her on her head come alive with colour.

"Whoa..." Beca breathed out, not fully able to handle the sight in front of her.

"Oh, morning Becs." Chloe smiled sleepily at her. "I must look a right state, barely got any sleep last night." Beca silently walked over to Chloe and took the coffee mug from her hands, setting it down on a nearby surface. Then she proceeded to give Chloe a long, slow, languid kiss that caused Chloe's toes to curl with every stroke of Beca's tongue against her own. When they finally broke apart, Chloe was left breathing heavily at Beca's actions.

"You are perfect Chloe." That did little to help Chloe regain her breathing pattern, nor did Beca's next actions. Watching curiously as Beca lifted Chloe's own hand to her chest and laid it palm flat above her heart, Chloe realised what she was doing as she felt the rapid thumping of Beca's heartbeat.

"You feel that?" Chloe nodded mutely. "You did that. You still do that to me after all this time. I don't know how but still just have to look at you and my heart goes crazy." Leaning in to capture Chloe's lips once more, Beca didn't break away till the hand that had previously been laid against her heart drifted a little lower and gave a firm squeeze. Chloe smirked as she heard her wife's gasp and saw her dilated pupils.

"Back to bed?"

"Yes. God yes."

* * *

"WHO IS SHE THEN?! WHO'S THE WHORE I HAVE TO KILL?!"

"Chloe! Calm down! Let's talk about this rationa-WHOA" Beca performed a spectacular dive to avoid the oncoming orange that had just come sailing her way. Taking shelter behind a nearby armchair, Beca had to wonder how Chloe had managed to get the oranges, was someone supplying her with throwable objects? She wouldn't put it past Aubrey...

"COME BACK HERE LITTLE HOBBIT! I'M NOT DONE WITH YOU YET!" Hobbit?! Okay, Aubrey definitely had something to do with this...Beca winced as another orange went flying past, bouncing of her carefully organised CD collection. Sensing a break in the fire while Chloe tried to get ahold of something else to throw, Beca quickly sprinted to the sofa where a very pregnant Chloe was currently sprawled out. Gripping Chloe's wrists so she couldn't attack the poor DJ, Beca leaned in and placed a firm but brief kiss on Chloe's mouth.

"Look, Chloe, I'm not cheating on you okay? I would never do that, I love you way too much to ever look at anybody else." Chloe eyed her suspiciously.

"Promise?"

"Yeah, promise."

"Okay...we should totes have sex now."

"What?"

"That kiss was amazing, don't you feel it baby?" Chloe whispered seductively.

"Uhh...Chloe...maybe not right this second..." Beca squirmed, trying to get away from Chloe's insistent hands working at the buttons of her shirt. Chloe's hands suddenly dropped and she looked at Beca with an affronted expression.

"Oh I see. You don't find me attractive any more, is that it? You think I'm a whale don't you? IS THAT WHY YOU'RE CHEATING ON ME?!"

"Ugh, Chloe I'm not-stop that!" Beca snatched the rolled up newspaper Chloe had been trying to whack her with out of her hands. "Chloe. Look at me. I am NOT cheating on you."

"Why were you fifteen minutes late coming home then?!" Chloe snapped.

"I stopped off at the store and got you some of that rose hip tea you like, I know you've been craving it lately." Beca reached into her bag and pulled out the little box she had stashed there in the naïve hope that she could surprise Chloe with a cup at some point. Beca watched as Chloe stared at the box, her eyes slowly welling up...oh no.

"Aw come on now Chlo, don't cry!" But it was too late, Chloe was now sobbing loudly and clutching heavily at Beca's shirt.

"I...**sob**...I'm so ...**sob**...sorry baby!"

"It's okay Chlo." Beca sighed, trying to hug the woman now bawling into her midsection.

"No it's ...**sob**...not! Here you are being the...**sob**...best wife ever and I'm …**sob**...yelling at you for...**sob**...cheating on me!" Chloe just burrowed further into Beca's stomach.

"Well that wasn't great but I know you didn't mean it." Chloe sat up suddenly and grabbed Beca's face, showering it with lots of little kisses.

"I'll do better baby! I promise! Just please don't leave me!"

"What? Chlo, of course I'm not going to leave you, you're the best thing that ever happened to me." Chloe finally stopped moving long enough to look into Beca's eyes.

"Really?"

"Really."

"Umm...Beca?"

"Yes Chloe?" Beca met the still watery eyes of her love.

"Can we cuddle for a bit?" Beca smiled knowing that, for however brief a period, she had nice sane Chloe back.

"Of course we can." Squidging in behind Chloe, Beca's hand automatically went round Chloe's front to cradle her stomach. Her heart warmed to feel the little kicks coming from it, letting her know they would soon be a family...and hopefully that the orange throwing Chloe time would soon be coming to an end.

* * *

Silence pervaded the house. An irrepressible, all encompassing silence that threatened the break Beca. She stared across the sofa at her wife, wondering how they got to this point, the point she had sworn to herself on their wedding day she would never let them reach.

"Pass the remote please." Came Chloe's crisp voice from the opposite end of the sofa. Each careful syllable like a dagger into Beca's heart.

"No."

"Beca." A warning bell, a sign that Chloe wasn't going to tolerate this tonight.

"No."

"Are you trying to start a fight?"

"Yes." Beca whispered. That got Chloe's attention.

"...what? Why?"

"Because at least then we'd be talking." Hearing the smaller woman's voice break, Chloe moved round to kneel in front of Beca.

"Beca?" Chloe's eyes examined her searchingly.

"How did we get here Chlo? I thought we were forever..." Chloe was alarmed to see tears gather in the DJ's eyes. She could count on one hand the number of times she'd seen Beca cry, this was serious.

"We are, I know we're fighting right now but that doesn't mean we're about to get a divorce." Chloe hurried to reassure the other woman.

"But we're not fighting, that's the problem."

"Wait...so you're upset because we're not fighting?"

"That's how it started with my parents." Realisation struck Chloe.

"Babe." Chloe called softly, trying to get Beca to meet her eyes. "We're not them okay? I didn't want to fight with the kids in the house, I thought we'd talk things over properly when they went for that group sleepover thing at Jesse and Aubrey's." Frantically brushing her hands at her face, Beca tried to get the damn tears to stop falling so she could speak properly.

"That's what my parents did too though, they never fought in front of me when they thought I could hear...it was just...silent. Then they stopped fighting altogether. They didn't care enough to even bother arguing anymore. It was so quiet all the time. That's how I got into music, I needed something to cover up the obvious sound of my parents not speaking to each other. They just...they just stopped trying. I promised myself I'd never do that but...but here we are."

Chloe's heart tore to see Beca so wounded, she thought exactly the same thing was going to happen to them. Cradling Beca's face in her hand and using her thumbs to brush away the tears, Chloe leaned in and placed a lingering kiss on Beca's lips.

"You listen to me right now Beca Mitchell. I love you. I am never going to stop trying to make things work with you, even when I want to smash your head into a brick wall. Seventeen years ago I promised I would spend the rest of my life loving you and I don't break promises. So whatever this is, we're going to work past it together, okay?" Beca sniffled and smiled as Chloe brushed away the last tear.

"I was right you know."

"About what?" Chloe looked worriedly at Beca, hoping she wasn't trying to restart their earlier argument after the moment they just shared.

"What I told you on our wedding day. I don't think I'm ever going to get used to you."

* * *

Beca stared at the tombstone in front of her. She'd been staring for a while. An entire lifetime together and it still hadn't been enough. She'd been right though, she never really had got used to Chloe, she'd still caused her heart to pump violently every time she walked into a room.

Laying the flowers down with shaking hands, she knew she didn't have much time left and she figured she wanted to spend her last moments on this earth with the woman she had never stopped loving since she first heard the words 'hi, any interest in joining our acapella group?' fall from her lips.

It hadn't been too hard to sneak out of the hospital, no doubt the nurses were all running about in a panic by now, Beca chuckled to herself, she still knew how to raise hell after all these years. It was upsetting she hadn't been able to see the kids one last time but Beca knew Michael would only have one opportunity to watch his son graduate and Laura was about to become a grandmother herself. She couldn't take those moments away from them so she kept the seriousness of her hospital trip to herself.

Painstakingly slowly Beca lowered herself to sit by the grave, leaning her weight against it. It was cold and hard, holding none of Chloe's warmth. Beca hoped there was some sort of afterlife so she could feel that warmth again. Closing her eyes one final time, Beca's last words were carried away by the wind.

"I'll never stop Chlo..."

* * *

_**In the words of the immortal genius Agnes: "IT'S SO FLUFFY I'M GONNA DIE" (if you don't get that quote then you need to sort your life out)**_


	2. Like You

_**Special shout out to:**_

_**hollyhwrites - What is life without a little fluff eh?  
itsmefiebs - Pretend you were doing some early morning onion chopping, that's a legit excuse right?  
becachloe - Good news! This one will just make you smile...I hope...if you feel the need to cry again then i've gone wrong somewhere...  
guest - Dude. Best. Review. EVER. =P  
Lackluster Brilliance - You like my story and Despicable Me. This means you are awesome. Please have a fantastic day in all your awesomeness.**_

_**for reviewing the first chapter. You gave me happies ^^  
...that sounded way less dodgy in my head, I swear.**_

_**This chapter was inspired by 'Bohemian Like You' by The Dandy Warhols.**_

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Bohemian Like You 

"BECKY! I NEED YOU TO TAKE A LOOK AT THE BMW, THE ENGINE STILL WON'T START AND I'M PRETTY SURE JESSE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT HE'S DOING WITH A CAR THAT NICE". Groaning, Beca wiped the sweat from her brow before mentally cursing as she remembered the hefty amount of car grease on her hand that was now also smeared all over her forehead.

Normally she loved her job but right now she was tired, sweaty and clad in grease stained overalls that hadn't seen the inside of a washing machine in far too long. Removing the top half of her overalls and using the arms to secure it around her waist, Beca felt a sense of relief as the cool air hit her body. She'd probably lose the tank top she was currently wearing to irremovable stains but right now that seemed like a necessary sacrifice to make sure she didn't pass out from heat exhaustion.

"I'M ON IT LUKE."Beca called round to the back of the shop where Luke's legs could faintly be seen poking out from under a truck. She moved over to the aforementioned car and immediately spotted Jesse's mistake, working quickly to try and repair it so she could go on her lunch break.

Beca had started working at Luke's mechanics about a year ago to pay the bills and had actually found a quiet comfort there, fixing things that were broken always gave Beca a satisfaction that was hard to replicate anywhere else. It was the same thing with her music, to her, the tracks seemed broken and as she mixed them together to create new sounds she was fixing it.

Beca let out a series of colourful expletives as she accidentally put her hand to a pipe she hadn't realised was boiling hot. All things considered, apart from the constant stream of injuries she received from various bits of equipment, it wasn't a bad job. She liked her co workers well enough, she was paid to do something she enjoyed and recently the job appeared to be producing some unintended perks...

"Rough day huh?" And there it was, there was her gorgeously red headed perk. One Miss Chloe Beale, bubbly enthusiast, terrible driver and all around car abuser. Beca just put on a mock horrified expression for Chloe.

"Oh god, what's wrong with it today?" Since Chloe had come in with a busted tyre a month ago, the happy girl seemed to run into no end of car trouble that meant she was now a frequent customer at Luke's and Beca happily enjoyed every single one of her visits but Luke usually swept in with his usual charm before Beca could summon the courage to talk to her properly. Used to the blonde haired Thor-like figure getting a date with a giggling female customer every other week, Beca had assumed that Chloe would soon be another victim of that smooth British accent. She wasn't though, Luke had yet to make any sort of progress and Chloe's resistance to his charm made Beca crush just that little bit harder on the perky girl.

"I don't know but whenever I park there's always a puddle of this green stuff coming from it if I leave it in the same place for too long." Not to mention there was that adorable little pout that graced her features every time something went wrong.

"Hmm, sounds like you might have a coolant leak. If we're lucky it'll be in an exterior hose and not inside the radiator." Chloe just blinked at Beca.

"The thingymajig is doing what now?" Amused, Beca just shook her head at the confused woman who jumped suddenly at the loud voice coming from the back of the shop.

"BECKY, I'VE GOTTA GO OUT FOR A LITTLE BIT. WATCH THE SHOP AND DON'T GO ON BREAK TILL I'M BACK." A sudden door slam indicated that Luke had gone, probably not realising the girl he liked to hit on most was currently in his shop wearing some scandalously short shorts.

"Well, guess it's just you and me then." Beca chuckled nervously, worried at the prospect of alone time with a beautiful woman that regularly caused her to lose her cognitive faculties. Especially when she was smiling the way she was now...wait, why was she smiling? When Beca voiced this thought out loud Chloe just smiled again, deviously this time, and said 'no reason'. Slightly off put by the look Chloe was now giving her, Beca moved over to the car and popped the hood. Soon spotting the source of the problem, Beca set to work.

"I was right, coolant leak. Actually a pretty simple problem, you could fix it yourself."

"Oh no, I couldn't do that. I'm hopeless with cars."

"Yeah, I see that. Maybe you should learn a little something about them, seems like you need it."

"Oh shut up." Chloe laughed and lightly hit Beca's arm, briefly causing her brain to short circuit at the feel of Chloe's soft skin against her own. Beca turned her attention back to the engine in front of her, she understood that, she could deal with that.

"Oh come on, even you could so this. See? All you need to do is unclamp the leaking hose, put on a new one, and then reinstall the clamp." Turning to place the affected hose down and fetch a new one, Beca couldn't help the quiet 'odd' that escaped her lips as she properly took in the make of car for the first time.

"What is?"

"Well...it's just that I know this brand of car. I used to have one too actually, they're made to be accident proof. Not particularly speedy or comfortable, but definitely accident proof. I never had a single problem with mine so it's just...it's just kind of odd your keeps causing you so much trouble." Chloe let loose what Beca could only describe as an uneasy giggle then pointed to her arm.

"I like your tattoo." Chloe blurted out, a little too loudly to be passed off as casual. Moving over to Beca, she used a single finger to begin tracing the outline of the faded grasshopper lying on the inside of her forearm.

"Uhhh...thanks...you're really not familiar with the concept of a personal bubble are you?"

"Nope. Anyway, I have one too." Chloe exclaimed, shoving her wrist in Beca's face to proudly show off the little ladybug there. "That means we're bug buddies and we have to become lifelong besties like right now."

"It does?"

"Yup. I think we're going to be fast friends." Chloe winked at her then moved to sit on the hood of a nearby car. Distracted by the movement of Chloe crossing those disastrously perfect legs, it took Beca a moment to realise Chloe was still speaking. "...return it."

"Huh? Sorry, what?"

"I said, I gave you a compliment, are you going to return it? That's sort of how conversation works." Beca was having trouble trying to keep up with the woman in front of her, even with said woman giving her tips on how to talk.

"It is?"

"You don't get out much do you?" The red head smirked and raised and eyebrow.

"No, not really."

"Well? I'm waiting..."

"Uh...I love your hair." Oh great Beca, could you sound any more awkward? she mentally chastised herself.

"Really?"

"Well yeah, it's gorgeous...uh...I mean, it's nice." Beaming at her, Chloe hopped down to invade Beca's personal bubble once more.

"I like yours too" Chloe whispered, curling a single strand of it around her finger. Beca quickly changed the subject and resumed work on the car, somewhat alarmed by the proximity of the other woman.

"Uh...so what is it you do exactly?"

"Pardon?"

"Well you did say we're going to be friends or whatever so...what do you do?"

"Well, I'm just waiting tables at the moment, trying to get some money."

"Oh yeah? Me too!"

"I thought you were a mechanic?"

"The joys of working in a world where a person can have several jobs. Trying to get enough money to set myself up in LA." Beca wasn't entirely sure why she was laying out her life plans for Chloe but she was surprised by how smoothly things were going. She'd never found conversation this easy before, even if she was currently grunting every other word as she tried to clamp this damn hose into place.

"No kidding? Why LA?"

"Want to become a DJ, figured LA is the best place to be for that."

"That's so cool! Are you going to be the next David Guetta?"

"You know David Guetta?" The music nerd in Beca let out a little 'whoop' that Chloe wasn't some brain dead generic music listener.

"Have I been living under a rock? His song 'Titanium' is my lady jam." Beca blinked as Chloe just smiled happily at her like she hadn't just told a practical stranger the song she masturbated to. This girl had surprised her more times than she could count in their brief conversation and her small crush on a gorgeous redheaded woman had turned into full blown liking of everything about Chloe's personality, not just her body. Realising that Beca probably wasn't going to speak for a while, Chloe continued.

"I want to go to LA too actually. I want to be a singer."

"Really?"

"Yeah, I'm just singing in a group called the Barden Bellas for now. Maybe you've heard of us?"

"No, sorry."

"It's okay, we're pretty new I suppose. Keeps me from letting my voice get rusty and every table I wait on gets me that one step closer to LA." Beca smiled as Chloe kept the conversation going, despite the fact she was now obviously done with the car. She was hanging around to talk to Beca, that was a good sign right?

"Yeah, that's how I think. This isn't exactly what I want to be doing right now but I like fixing cars and the place I waitress at makes this really delicious Italian food which I get to eat for free ."

"You get to eat for free?"

"Yeah, I'm good friends with Lily, she's the cook there. I have no idea what she puts in the food to make it so mouth-wateringly good, and to be honest I'm not sure I want to ask because she kind of creeps me out, but she always keeps some back for me at the end of my shift."

"That's incredible, wish my restaurant did that. All we've got for a cook is this jerk named Bumper who thinks deep frying stuff and covering it in salt can be called cooking." Beca smiled as Chloe sniffed huffily, she obviously wasn't a big fan of this Bumper guy.

"Ouch, you should come by my restaurant sometime. We'll show you how it's done."

"Seriously?"

"Yeah, I can get Lily to cook you something that you'll really love, no deep frying involved."_ Good work Mitchell!_ Beca internally cheered herself. _Now you can hang out a little more, try and figure out if she's gay, try and figure out if she's interested, then maybe pluck up the courage to ask her on a date sometime. _

"Soooo...would this be a date?" Wait...what?! Beca spluttered as Chloe smiled hopefully at her.

"Uh...you...uh...I mean...would that be something you would be interested in?"

"Yes. Very." Chloe stared at Beca intently.

"Umm...well then...would you like to go on a date with me sometime?" Chloe beamed at Beca.

"Definitely. Here, give me your phone." Beca handed it over without a word, still not really believing this was happening. Chloe quickly handed it back. "There, now I have your number so you have to follow through." Beca just nodded dumbly. "Is my car all done then?" Another nod. Sensing she probably wasn't going to get much more out of the brunette, Chloe gave her a quick kiss on the cheek and whispered 'see you soon' before getting into her car to drive off. Finally coming to her senses, Beca called out to the now moving car.

"Hey! Wait!" The car stopped and Chloe rolled down the window as Beca came running up.

"Yes Beca?"

"I just gotta ask...why me?" Chloe just shrugged and then said in the most casual voice Beca had ever heard

"Cause I like you." And then she was gone, leaving Beca with such a big grin on her face it was starting to hurt her cheek muscles.

* * *

Three months later and Beca didn't think it was possible to be this happy with another human being. As someone who had spent the majority of their adult life seeking solitude, she now found herself surprisingly dependent on Chloe's company, even if it was just hanging out doing nothing. She's even managed to get the approval of the best friend, though it wasn't easy. Beca had endured many Aubrey patented glares and snide remarks before she fixed the girl's garbage disposal.

After that Aubrey transformed into a caring, compassionate, if slightly uptight, acquaintance that Beca was even beginning to feel might be better termed as 'friend'. Aubrey's friendship definitely had it's perks, she knew everything about Chloe. Everything, including how Chloe had spotted this hot mechanic when she went to get her tyre fixed this one time and had then got her friend Cynthia Rose to repeatedly damage the car in minor ways so she'd have an excuse to go back there. Beca couldn't stop laughing when Aubrey revealed that Chloe had spent the better part of that month referring to Luke as the GBCB (the giant blonde cock block). Beca was actually rather concerned for Aubrey's well being after she revealed that considering the evils Chloe was giving her.

The only thing now giving her worry was the fact that she still hadn't seen Chloe's apartment. At all. The red head was perfectly happy to come barrelling into hers at any and all hours of the day but as soon as Beca hinted that it might be nice to see Chloe's for a change, the conversation suddenly found itself redirected...or Beca suddenly found herself very naked and no longer caring about any apartment and oh god now Chloe was naked too.

Then the storm struck. Rain, wind, thunder, lightning, you name it, it was happening. Beca and Chloe had been out for a nice meal and seeing as how they'd both wanted to drink, they'd decided they'd get the train back to Beca's. Trains that were now no longer running due to the appalling weather conditions.

"WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO?" Beca yelled, trying to make herself heard over the howling wind. The rain was coming down so thick she could barely see Chloe even though they were standing right next to each other. "IT'S A LONG WALK BACK, I'M PRETTY SURE WE'D FREEZE BEFORE WE GOT THERE. MAYBE WE SHOULD JUST FIND A HOTEL FOR THE NIGHT?" Teeth chattering, Chloe looked at her sodden girlfriend through the rain and knew what she had to do.

"FOLLOW ME." Chloe shouted, grabbing Beca's hand and tugging her along the darkened streets.

"WHERE ARE WE GOING?"

"BACK TO MY PLACE. IT'S NOT TOO FAR." Despite the rain that had now managed to find it's way into places rain was never meant to reach, Beca smiled.

One very difficult walk later and they were happily dripping on Chloe's carpet, soaking up the warmth of the place. Beca couldn't see why Chloe had been so reluctant to bring her back here, it was a very nice place. Nicer than Beca's actually, smiling as Chloe scurried off to go put their coats in the airing cupboard, Beca took in the flat. The open plan kitchen, the wide flat screen tv, the angry looking man, the...wait...what? Turning back, Beca saw a man sitting on the sofa with scowl on his face to rival Aubrey's that one time Beca had been perusing her record collection and not realising it was carefully alphabetised and sorted according to genre.

"Uhhh...hi?" Random sofa man just grunted and walked into a nearby room slamming the door with more force than was really required. Chloe reappeared, looking nervous as she eyed the small brunette. "Chloe...why do you have a random angry sofa dweller in your flat?"

"Ah...so you've met Tom then."

"Tom?" Chloe looked sheepishly at Beca, knowing she immediately understood exactly who Tom was. "Tom. Your ex Tom?" Chloe just nodded, still looking guiltily at Beca. "Okay...I'm hoping there's some kind of explanation here?"

"Well...when we first moved in together we signed up for a year contract and then we broke up we realised neither of us could afford the place by ourselves and...well it's a really really really nice place that's near to both of our jobs so neither of us wanted to move out so...yeah. We keep trying to make each other's lives a living hell so the other will move out and we can get someone else to move in but we're both kind of stubborn so we kind of live together now..." Chloe looked anxiously at Beca, waiting for the angry explosion she had been trying to avoid by keeping Beca away from the flat.

"Okay, cool." Beca shrugged.

"What? You're not mad?" Beca moved over to her blinking girlfriend and rubbed her hands gently up and down her still soaked arms.

"Chloe, the way you were keeping me away from this place I was nearly convinced you were living in a crack den. This is a lot easier to handle."

"Aren't you jealous or worried at all?"

"Not really, I'm thinking a girl who spends a month deliberately causing damage to her car so she can come talk to me has got to at least be kind of interested."

"I'm still going to kill Aubrey for telling you that." Chloe grumbled. Beca just smiled at her girlfriend's antics.

"Yeah, I'm a little hurt you didn't tell me but... I like you, and I can deal with this because you make me feel things I'm pretty sure I've never felt before so...as long as Tom always pays his rent on time so I don't have an excuse to kick his butt then we won't have a problem." Smiling at Chloe, Beca happily leaned into Chloe's hand as she pulled Beca in for a kiss. Despite their sodden attire, things soon heated up and Beca let out a groan as Chloe did that sinful thing with her tongue.

"Aw gross, come on Chloe! I don't need to see that!" The two girls broke apart just in time to see an obviously disgruntled Tom snatch a bit of chicken from the fridge before disappearing back into his room. Chloe frowned.

"That was my chicken."

"Jackass." Chloe eyed her girlfriend appreciatively.

"You know...Tom's bedroom is right next to mine..." Beca wasn't sure where Chloe was going with this but she had this devious look that Beca knew to be wary of. Last time Chloe had that look she'd ended up in a pair of handcuffs...not that she was complaining...that was a very good night. "If we were loud enough I'm pretty sure he'd go sleep on the couch..."

"Hmm, I like this plan."

"And if he has to keep on sleeping on the couch...well then, he may just decide it's not worth staying here anymore." Beca grinned at Chloe, very much liking the way this conversation was going. Chloe's hand moved to the back of Beca's neck where Beca moaned as Chloe's nails began scraping lightly at the skin there. Then Chloe's mouth was next to her ear and every word she whispered came with a light flick of the tongue that had Beca going weak at the knees.

"So...Beca...do you think you can make me scream?"

Tom moved out a week later.

* * *

_**Question, do you guys prefer to fix things yourselves or take it to a professional? I'm a 'fix it yourself' type of girl and it baffles me that most of my friends don't even know how to change a tyre. Never try and fix your iPod yourself though, trust me, that is not a road you want to go down. I tried it once, bad move.**_


	3. Don't Speak

_**This chapter was inspired by 'Don't Speak' by No Doubt and 'Red' by Tyler Ward (originally written by Taylor Swift...the cover is way better though)**_

* * *

Don't Speak 

_"Hi. Any interest in joing our acapella group?" _

_From that moment, all Beca knew was red. Red hair that haunted her every thought. Red hot blinding passion. She' tried to change her mind, tried to remind herself that she was only here to pass time till she went to LA...but it was to late. Too late to change her mind, it was like trying to change her mind once she was in the middle of a freefall, impossible and futile. _

Beca sat on the couch, staring at the glass in front of her. She knew what she was doing, drinking to forget, drinking to feel numb. When she was drunk she was able to distract herself with the way everything seemed slightly out of focus, the perpetual taste of vodka on her tongue long after she finished her drink, the slight light headedness that allowed her to forget about every little detail that had previously been running through her brain on a loop.

_Laughing, Beca took in the stars flying fast above. She'd never been in a convertible before, she'd never seen the point. Now, with the wind blowing through her hair, she couldn't imagine feeling more right than she did right now, her fingers intertwined with Chloe's and the possiblity of a whole future in front of them._

Then...there it was, the slow sound of a key sliding into a lock and opening the door. Soft footsteps approaching her. The thing Beca noticed most though was the quiet. Beca had never seen the appeal of silence, she'd heard people speak of a 'comfortable silence' that could be shared with another person, to her that just seemed foolish. Even when on her own, Beca felt the need to fill the muted atmosphere with music.

Then Chloe had come along, at first there was never a moment of silence. Anytime she was with Chloe, there was a constant stream of information pouring from the girl's mouth and, in time, Beca came to love that never ending ability to converse. It made her feel comfortable in the other girl's presence that she was just able to sit back and listen. What shocked her most was that she actually wanted to listen to everything Chloe was saying.

Normally she tuned the other person speaking out with ideas of a new mix she could create...but with Chloe, it was different. With Chloe, Beca found herself paying attention to every syllable that dropped out of the girl's mouth, even the inane babble about which type of nail polish to buy. Suddenly all of that somehow seemed important.

_"What?" Chloe asked, eyes peering at Beca over the top of her book._

"Nothing."

"No seriously, what?"

"It's...it's just...i'm wondering how I find you so fascinating when you're doing something so simple as reading a textbook." Chloe smiled at Beca and instantly she knew the answer to her own question. She loved Chloe. Everything she wanted was right there in front of her in a pink onesie. Beca hated on onesies but on Chloe...it was kind of cute.

The first time Chloe kissed her...Beca wasn't sure what to do. All she heard was the sound of her blood thumping through her veins, that slight pause as her breath caught in her throat and the dull roar of all her feelings that she had repressed for so long slowly coming to the surface of her being. Then came the silence. A stillness Beca had never known before. A stillness she enjoyed.

Finally she knew what people meant by a 'comfortable silence'. She and Chloe worked side by side, both doing completely different things, neither one communicating but still...Beca knew she felt a thousand times better just for the simple fact that Chloe was there, in the same room as her. That's what got to her the most. They didn't have any form of interaction, they both could have done exactly the same thing separated from each other but it just felt so much more...perfect with Chloe there.

Taking another sip of her overly vodka filled drink, Beca knew this was a different kind of silence. One based on Chloe trying to formulate the words she needed to make this right. How could she though? How could anyone ever make this right? Beca could feel her, Chloe's gaze focused on her own small figure hunched over the drink in front of her, desperately trying to come up with some sort of explanation...some sort of reason why.

But what 'why' could explain this? Beca had never been particularly open to the idea of sharing her emotions with another human being but right now, all she wanted was someone to talk to about all this. The problem was, the only person she would consider talking to was the person who had caused her so much pain. Even when they argued, Beca went to Chloe.

_"Sorry?"_

"Are you saying that because you're actually sorry or because it's what you think I want I hear?"

"Uhh, the first one?"

"You suck at apologies Beca."

"Look, I'm sorry about that, I really am but...sometimes I don't know what you want from me so...if I do something wrong, it takes me a little while to figure it out. You're kind of like a crossword puzzle you know? You take some figuring out." 

That was why she hated Chloe so much right now. Chloe was the best friend she'd ever had, any problem Beca had ever had, she'd taken to Chloe in the knowledge that Chloe could make her feel better. Now...who was she supposed to take the problem to? That was what cut Beca most, Chloe was her best friend, but she was losing her in all this. She didn't really have anyone else to talk to the way she could talk to Chloe. There was always Jesse but Jesse's opinions always seemed to lead to the suggestion that she and Chloe should break up, Beca got the feeling he wasn't being completely impartial in his judgement.

"Beca." A soft whisper travelled through the room. Two short syllables. Only two syllables yet each one conveyed the sense of guilt Chloe felt. Beca couldn't stand to hear it. The sound of remorse in Chloe's words. Chloe's mouth opened again, to offer an explanation, to try and justify her actions somehow, but Beca couldn't stand to hear it.

"Don't speak. I don't know what crap you came up with to try and make sense of what you did...but I don't know how to hear it. I...I want to know there was some reason you did what you did, but at the same time I don't want to know anything. I just... I just want to remember for a bit okay?"

"Remember what?"

"Remember a time when we weren't like this. Remember a time when all we knew was each other."

"Beca..."

"No Chloe...don't. I don't want to hear your excuses. Do you know what I wish?"

"What?"

"I wish I had someone to talk to. Someone I could speak to about all my feelings but...the only person I want to speak to about those things is you and...well, I can't talk to you now can I?"

"Why not?"

"Because you fucking cheated Chlo! Because I want someone to talk to about how fucking wrong I feel! About how every waking moment all I can think of is you with someone else and it makes me sick to my stomach the idea that you could ever look at anyone else the way you used to look at me."

Chloe just stared at her, her blue eyes welling up with emotion. Beca tried not to care, She really tried not to show how much Chloe's crying affected her, but she couldn't. Chloe always had a way of getting through to her, even in times when she never wanted to see her fucking face again. It appeared that hadn't changed, even after the knowledge that she had been fucking another man had recently come to light. Beca still craved Chloe's presence.

What got to Beca most was the two-facedness of it all. Say what you want about Beca, but she was always honest. If she disliked you, she made sarcastic comments and put you down, but if she liked you, there was nothing in the world that would stop Beca Mitchell from trying to keep you happy. She could be crass, she could be sarcastic, she could be mean, but Beca Mitchell was none of those things if she considered you a friend.

Chloe on the other hand...Beca didn't get how you could look into another person's eyes and lie. If she had to lie, she avoided eye contact, she moved the conversation on swiftly and hoped the other person never confronted her on her sudden topic change. Chloe was different though. She'd looked into Beca's eyes a thousand different times in a thousand different ways and swore that she loved her.

When Beca brought her that cup of tea after a hard study session, when Beca sat down and listened to all of Chloe's building emotions even though Beca like to avoid emotional conversations at all costs, when Beca listened to her various music choices even though she had proclaimed, apart from her love of David Guetta, that Chloe's music taste was shit. Every single time, Beca had put her own feelings aside to make Chloe feel like she was the most important person in the world because, to Beca, she was.

_"I DON'T CARE." _

_"Come on Beca, LA was your dream. You're not going to throw that all away on some university fling are you?" Beca never thought she'd see the day where her father argued for her to go to LA, but it was happening. After the ICCA finals, her dad was all in favour of Beca packing up and moving out to start her career, Beca didn't want to though. All her dreams, all her plans were before she found Chloe...before she found out that love could be that strong. _

And now...now? Now, it seemed like none of it mattered. Beca had tried, she had never tried so hard in a relationship...but...but it wasn't enough. She'd given it all but the person she'd loved had still found comfort in someone else. Someone else had seen the real Chloe, looked into her eyes as she came undone and knew what it was truly like to see Chloe in a state of complete bliss. Beca had thought that was something she only was privilege to...but she wasn't.

It felt like...she wasn't sure what it felt like. She'd never felt it before. Something was happening in her chest. Something that felt like her heart was thudding violently, trying to break free. For the first time since her parents divorce, Beca wanted nothing more than to break down and cry. It caused her to swallow repeatedly, trying to hold back the tears. She would give anything not to feel that way anymore. When she'd first found how strong love could feel, she felt ecstatic. She'd never known the depth of emotion she could feel at the glimpse of that red hair. Now it threatened to kill her with every waking breath.

She knew what was supposed to happen now, Jesse had shown her a thousand different movies, a thousand different scenarios in which the female protagonist went through a life changing experience and realised she was better off on her own. Beca tried so hard to forget her, so hard to erase the image of Chloe Beale from her brain...but it wasn't happening. Images, flashbacks and echoes went on a permanent reel in her brain.

The night Chloe came stumbling into her flat, apologising and trying to get Beca to listen to her, Beca had tried to hear her out in the hope that she could get out of this blue, depressing cycle, but all she was left with was the image of Chloe with her legs wrapped around someone else. So she'd sent her away, just like all the girl's in the movies. Every time she felt sad, she reminded herself that the female protagonist in every story had to endure some hardship before she found her true love.

But as the days went on, all Beca could think about was Chloe, the fantastic silences they shared, the time when they talked and Beca hadn't meant to reveal that much about herself but did anyway just because the idea of keeping something from Chloe was so alien to her.

And tonight Chloe had come back, pleading for a second chance, Beca looked at the girl in front of her, the girl on her knees pleading for her to take her back. She'd watched ridiculously clichéd movies with Jesse where she'd harshly critiqued the girl now returning to her male lover despite the fact that he had cheated on he with another woman, she'd always hated those girls. Those girl so willing to sacrifice their self respect for the idea of something so trivial as the concept of love that the boyfriend had clearly thrown away for a good lay.

Now that Beca found herself in love, the decisions those girls had made seemed so much more reasonable. When the person you loved, the person you told everything to was caught in a lie, it was so hard to remember the infidelity when you were looking over old photos of times well spent. Loving Chloe? Well...it was everything Beca had ever wanted and gaining a new found sense of being didn't seem nearly so important as the idea of holding Chloe in her arms again.

She knew what she was supposed to do. Knew she was supposed to gain some measure of respectability back by turning Chloe away. That's what Jesse wanted her to do. But she didn't. With much trepidation, she lent forward and pressed her lips to Chloe's own. Beca didn't know much about philosophy or whatever the hell else she was supposed to be studying at this godforsaken university but if there was one thing she had learned it was this; moving on from Chloe Beale was impossible. She'd tried countless times to tell herself to let go but every time she did, all she was left with was images of the perfect moments in her and Chloe's relationship.

What followed was a tense awkward relationship that Beca didn't quite recognise. Each word was carefully phrased. Each gesture hesitantly issued. The only thing that returned to normal was the sex. Everything else felt too...careful to be normal, Chloe had never been careful, she came in both guns blazing to everything she did. That's why this restrained atmosphere was so wrong. It wasn't Chloe. Maybe one day they could return to normal but right now, all she could think about in their most intimate moments was whether or not Chloe had ever looked at him the way she looked at Beca.

* * *

_**You can blame my friend Shawn for this. He knows if you give me angsty music to listen to when i'm drunk, I get all broody and intense which usually manifests itself in the form of a story and...well, he gave me angsty music so it's completely his fault. Like, 100 percent. I did warn you guys some would be sad.**_

Anyways, thank you to all reviewers again, you guys make my day with every email alert I get =)

Lackluster Brilliance - Might've slightly killed the awesome Chloe in this one...sorry about that.  
anonp - Thank you, glad you liked it. Hmmm...creepy gluing of things...methinks I sense a potential Lily moment here =P  
number1 - Although I still mourn the loss of my ipod, i'm happier in the knowledge others have learnt from my mistakes. =)  
BardenBellaBeca - What can I say? Couldn't resist =P  
Guest - Dude, keep giving me these insane reviews and i'm going to have to personally track you down and give you a hug =P  
itsmefiebs - Good to know i'm not the only one out there who likes to meddle with things till they're fixed =)

...upon completing these review responses, I realise I may be entirely too dependent on emoticons...meh, whatever works =D  
So, new question, what's your favourite thing to do when you're feeling in an intense angsty mood?


	4. Photograph

_**My first attempt at something a little more steamy. Reviews really would be appreciated on this one because I want to know if this is a style of writing I should just stay away from completely. Just to let you guys know, probably going to be out of action for a little bit. Back to uni now and I got a lot to do for the next week including FINALLY going to see the Hobbit, MUCH EXCITEMENT.**_

**_This chapter was inspired by 'Photograph' by Def Leppard._**

* * *

Photograph

Beca panted heavily as she stared up at her ceiling, still trying to calm down from her night time activities. Frustrated by the lack of Chloe in her life, she'd taken a page out of Chloe's book and now had to apologise to Amy for the loud blasting of 'Titanium' coming from her room most nights. She suspected the poor Australian was now regretting her decision to move in with Beca for second year. It wasn't her fault though, she and Chloe had barely had any time together before Chloe had upped and moved out to LA to start work in some hospital she'd found.

After a brief stint with Jesse wherein Beca realised the clichéd 'boy gets the girl' movie ending just wasn't going to cut it, she and Chloe had spent almost the entire summer hanging out together, growing closer and closer with each passing day. Beca realised just in time how much she truly cared for the redhead who had come barrelling into her life with no apology...or clothes for that matter.

So, three days before Chloe was set to leave and start her life in LA, she and Beca shared their first kiss. It was sweet, it was tender, it was all the emotions Beca could ever hope to express in one action and it was perfect. The second one was considerably less so. The second one was hot, heavy and led to Chloe pinning Beca against the fridge, her tongue aggressively assaulting Beca's own and her leg gently thrusting in between Beca's just enough to drive the young DJ crazy.

Then stupid Aubrey had appeared and yelled at them for knocking her carefully organised magnets off of the fridge. Still, at least she congratulated them on finally dealing with their toners before, much to the annoyance of a disgruntled Beca, she dragged Chloe away to help her categorise boxes. Through all the arguments they'd had that year, every angry verbal war, Beca had never been so ready to harm the blonde woman as she was in that moment.

It was very odd for Beca, sure she'd found people attractive before, been curious as to what they looked like naked and all that jazz but she'd never had this...this..._need _for another human being. She'd found sex pleasurable before but that one moment with Chloe brought her more heat than she had ever felt before, even that time she had her legs wrapped around the school heart throb after prom and he really was gorgeous.

Beca still didn't know what Chloe had done to her, to make her image invade Beca's every waking thought. She supposed she first noticed in the shower, I mean really, how hard is it just to not look down? She had though, several times. Once just wasn't enough to take in all that skin on display. All that glorious dripping skin. That's what baffled Beca, she'd always been perfectly in control of her urges but Chloe comes along and suddenly every bit of self-control goes out the window. Now she's as horny as a teenage boy in a crowded locker room of semi naked girls.

She wasn't even granted relief at night. Chloe's teasing image invaded her dreams and did unthinkable things to her till Beca woke up in a heaving sweaty mess, throbbing for some contact. It was always the same, that one memory of the brief moment they had together on the afternoon that Chloe was due to leave.

_Beca grunted as she tried to force the zip to go just those last few inches. She let out a cry of victory as the thing suddenly gave way and did all the way up. Turning to beam at the woman she now got to call her girlfriend, Beca felt overwhelming joy as Chloe finished writing 'text books' on the last box. They were done. Knowing that she and Chloe barely had any time left and that Chloe still had to pack everything up before she went. Beca had resolutely spent every moment of the past three days helping Chloe organise, sort and pack everything in her place just to have a little more time with her. It had actually been quite fun once she'd hired Stacie to come kidnap Aubrey and drag her out of the flat for a while so Beca didn't have to another lecture on the proper process of folding a t-shirt._

_"We did it Becs, we finally did it." Chloe beamed at the girl opposite her, still not really believing they'd managed to get everything done before her parents arrived to drive her to the airport. Beca didn't respond, she just went and collapsed on Chloe's now stripped bed, stretching out to unkink her back muscles._

_"I'm just going to stay here for a little bit okay?" The exhausted DJ replied. Chloe bit her lip at the sight of her girlfriend happily sprawled on the bed, her tank top lifting just enough to show a sliver of that perfect skin...it was just too tempting._

_Beca's eyes shot wide open when she felt a weight settle itself on her upper thighs. The sight that greeted her was Chloe comfortably straddling her thighs, bottom lip still trapped by her teeth._

_"Chl-mmph!" Beca was silenced as Chloe leaned down and captured her mouth with her own. As their lips moved together, Beca's hands instinctively went to Chloe's hips, trying to hold back a groan as Chloe's tongue slid into her mouth. Every nerve in Beca's body electrified as Chloe adjusted her position so their lower halves were now perfectly aligned. Beca was unable to control the moan that slid past her lips this time as Chloe's hips pushed her down further into the bed. The pleasure was exquisitely painful and Beca had to have more. Without realising it till they were there, Beca's hands moved round to Chloe's ass. Enjoying the firm flesh beneath her fingers, Beca gave a squeeze, relishing the strangled noise that came from Chloe's mouth and the way her hips pivoted down into Beca's once more. Beca tried to focus as Chloe began kissing a line down her jaw to her neck but any attempt to do so went straight out the window though as soon as she latched on to Beca's pulse point and sucked. Hard. Beca body convulsed, a shock of heat went straight down to her nether regions and she pulled Chloe more firmly to her body, needing more contact. And then they were moving together, thrusting, gasping, rollin their hips into one another, each muscle in their bodies so tense it felt like a single thing could cause them to explode. The room was perfectly quiet aside from the little gasps and moans escaping their mouths with each desperate thrust. Every movement, every little catch in their breathing brought them closer and closer and clo-_

_"Chloe darling?! Are you there?!" Chloe reacted instantly, throwing herself off the now still figure beneath her, her voice sounded somewhat croaky as she called 'coming mum!' down the stairs. Beca wasn't sure but she thought she heard Chloe grumble 'or at least I would've been' as she left the room to go greet her parents. _

Every single goddamn time she closed her eyes it happened. Chloe was never there when she woke though, even when Beca sorted herself out so she didn't go crazy with frustration, she was always struck with a deep panging feeling in her chest afterward that she was alone. It had been a month and Chloe's schedule had only just settled down enough that they were able to Skype on a regular basis. Exhausted, the red head tended to call Beca when she was in bed...in her barely there pajamas and no bra. It was like she was trying to kill the DJ with sexual frustration. It was the only reasonable explanation.

Beca started as her phone blipped into life beside her. It was probably Chloe again, she liked to send her pictures of everything she could in LA, nice scenery, bars she promised she was going to show Beca when she visited, though why Chloe was sending her stuff this late at night she had no idea.

Beca blinked at the image in front of her. That wasn't scenery. It definitely wasn't a bar either. It was Chloe. Chloe in some outrageously provocative lingerie, hand placed high up on her thigh, tantalising close to the edge of her underwear. Beca could almost hear Chloe whispering the 'thinking of you xxxxx' that accompanied the text. Her heart stopped just for a moment before all the blood in her body came roaring back into life and headed straight down in between her legs. She didn't want this photograph, it just wasn't enough. She needed Chloe. Now.

* * *

Chloe sighed as she checked her phone again and saw no flashing little light to indicate she had a missed text or call. Since she'd sent that picture two nights ago, all communication from Beca had suddenly ceased. They hadn't not spoken for this long since that fight when she changed the set list mid performance.

Chloe worried that she had pushed her girlfriend too far, she wasn't sure how comfortable Beca was with the idea of sex but she had enough trouble keeping her hands off the young DJ in the brief three days they were together. Chloe knew she had to try and get Beca ready for the idea before one of them visited the other or she was going to spontaneously combust with sexual frustration.

So...she always made sure whenever she Skyped Beca that she was in some less than modest clothing, she liked to send texts with subtle innuendos, everything she could do to make Beca want her the way Chloe had always wanted the brunette. It had just been little things up till now, then she finally took the plunge and sent that somewhat risky text to Beca and now...nothing. No reply.

_Great work Chloe, spend a year pining after the girl then send one stupid text and you've managed to scare her off_ Chloe thought bitterly to herself. A hurried sounding knock at the door brought her out of her self-imposed pity party. Not particularly in the mood to deal with random visitors, Chloe stayed still, hoping whoever it was would go away. No such luck, the knocking came again, more frantic and insistent this time.

"Alright! Alright! I'm coming!" Chloe called angrily as she made her way to the door and opened it...then she froze at the sound and sight of the girl before her.

"Not yet you're not."

* * *

Harold Johnson had initially been quite pleased with his new flat neighbour. She was polite, always gave him a warming smile and didn't stay up late partying like most kids her age. All in all she was just a nice young girl who was very considerate of other people. Then, the person he assumed was Chloe's girlfriend that the poor woman had obviously been very distraught over leaving, had appeared.

He'd been sympathetic at first, choosing to ignore the sounds coming from the next apartment because it was obvious from their brief chats just how much Chloe missed the other woman, but this was just getting ridiculous. It had been nearly three days now with only a couple of hours of silence here and there. Would they _ever _run out of energy?

* * *

_**Thanks to the following for reviewing:**_

_**whoselineisitany - Thought about putting an angst warning at the beginning but I thought it would take away from the fic if you knew it was coming, does that make sense?**_

_**ArcaFeretory - Haha, happy songs sound good but sadly I have ridiculously sensitive teeth that means I can no longer eat chocolate, maybe that's why I get so angsty...=P  
anonp - A bit of Bon Iver is always good, think Creature Fear is my favourite because that's the first one I heard =)  
number1 - That's why I like music so much, it can completely change my mood. Glad you're enjoying it, i'm trying to keep from just writing the same chapter in different settings everytime.  
Hatecheating - Yeah, I know how you feel. Fortunately i've never been cheated on but my best friend has and one of the worst experiences of my life was trying to comfort her afterwards and knowing there was nothing I could really do to make it better.  
Lackluster Brilliance - I've got a couple of chapters planned for another time that'll make you happy then =P And yeah, I can never tell whether or not someone is joking with an emoticon handy.  
That sounds awesome, normally if I exercise to get rid of angst, I go swimming because it calms me down. I think if I started punching something, I'd just get angrier and wouldn't stop till I hurt myself.  
sophiekrop12 - Thank you, it's always nice to hear someone is enjoying it =)**_

_**Question time! This is like a thing now ;)**_  
_**What's something about you that shocks people or catches them by surprise? Mine is that, despite having a slightly more than average love of water and water based activities, I am actually allergic to it. Well...that's a bit of an exaggeration, i'm allergic to the chemicals they use to treat water, chlorine and the suchlike but then I can be affected even in salt or fresh water because it has a sort of placebo effect. I get crazily itchy legs and my face goes red and sore for a while after so people are always surprised to hear that I still voluntary go in water as much as possible. What can I say? I love water...pretty sure I was a mermaid in a past life...**_


	5. Kiss Me

_**Hey guys, sorry for the slow update. I meant to have this up by Thursday but after we saw the Hobbit, I ended up essentially living at my mate's flat for a bit so we could have a Lord of the Ringsathon and then my brother was bored today and wouldn't stop pestering me to go see him so...yeah, sorry about that. The irony of course being that, until recently, everything was on SkyDrive so I could have just uploaded it from my mate's laptop but since I finally managed to download Word, I deleted everything off of there. Life's a bitch eh?**_

_**If any of you guys have a song or an idea you would like me to write then let me know. I can't guarantee I'll be able to do something with it, either something speaks to me or it doesn't. For example, I think the song 'Kiss Me Slowly' by Parachute screams Bechloe but I just can't think of a good way to write it. Also, no screamo, dub step, opera or Justin Bieber. I have a very eclectic music taste but those are four areas I know I can write off completely.**_

This chapter was inspired by 'Kiss Me' by Sixpence None The Richer.

* * *

Kiss Me

**Six**

Somewhere in the midst of a field of barley was a tree and in that tree was a young girl of six years, happily staring at a ladybug continuing its endless journey along the branch. Bright blue eyes watched with fascination as the ladybug took each tiny step, she'd thought about helping the ladybug out but she didn't know where it was going and what if she made the ladybug's journey longer? That just wouldn't do at all.

Chloe suddenly became aware of a subtle thrashing noise, the sound of someone approaching through the barley. Peering out from her spot in the tree, Chloe saw a small figure violently pushing the barley out the way, making a beeline for the tree. Her tree.

The newcomer soon reached it and began climbing quickly, Chloe had meant to call out to this strange intruder, tell them this was her tree and they weren't welcome...but something held her back. This person had impressive tree climbing skills, maybe they'd like to climb trees with her.

So Chloe stayed silent and observed the small figure as they pushed their hood back off their face, which is when Chloe realised 'they' was actually a 'she' and 'she' was crying. This upset Chloe, the girl was far too pretty to cry.

"Don't cry." The girl let out a startled yelp at hearing another voice in a seemingly abandoned tree. She jumped so violently she lost her balance on the branch and went plummeting to the floor below. Woops.

Quickly jumping down from the tree to see if mystery girl was alright, Chloe panicked that she's just lost the opportunity to make a new friend. Help her up! That would make things better! Grabbing the small girl, Chloe hauled her to her feet and began patting the dust off of her clothes. The girl quickly knocked her hands away.

"Leave me alone." The girl said bitterly, climbing the tree once more and sitting on her chosen branch.

"Um, I can't." Chloe knew she probably could have but the girl was in her tree, AND she recognised the look on the girl's face. It was like that time James and Matty had been playing basketball on the driveway and Matty had knocked James over. James said he wasn't hurt but he had a big bruise on his arm and he looked like he was about to cry.

This girl wanted to cry but she didn't want Chloe to see. She wasn't going to stand for that.

"Why not?" the girl called down.

"You're in my tree."

"S'not your tree!"

"Is too!"

"Is not!" Chloe saw the stubborn look on the girl's face, there was only one way to settle this.

"We'll climb for it!"

"Huh?"

"Fastest to climb to the top wins!" The girl scowled, clearly considering Chloe's proposition.

"And if I win, you'll leave me alone?"

"Pinky promise." The girl smirked and climbed down from her branch so they were on even footing. "Ready?" the girl just nodded, staring at the tree and planning a route up. "Three, two, one...GO!" Chloe smiled as the girl went for what looked like the easy path, but soon got difficult as the branches thinned out near the top. This girl was good, but Chloe was better.

A few minutes later, Chloe sat happily at the top of the tree, watching the other girl desperately trying to grab a branch just out of her reach. The girl even tried jumping for the branch but ended up saying that rude word Chloe's mum had made her swear she would _never_ say again after that time Matty had told her it was another way of saying 'hello' which had led to an extremely unfortunate incident with the vicar's wife.

"You're not s'posed to say that word! It's bad!" Chloe called down. The girl just glowered up at Chloe from her spot on the tree. After realising where Chloe was, the girl's face fell, knowing she had lost the bet. It was obvious she was curious about Chloe had done it though. Chloe thought the look on her face was adorable…and she knew the special word, maybe they could still be friends? "Put your hand on that little knobbly thing there, then you can swing over to the next branch." The girl looked at her suspiciously but did as she said.

"Now what?"

"Now you can reach that branch on your right!" Chloe giggled happily as the look of delight on the girl's face grew with every branch Chloe directed her to. Soon enough she was sitting beside her on the branch, puffing slightly from the exertion but clearly very happy with progress made. Turning her face to smile shyly at Chloe, the girl whispered a quiet 'thank you'. Chloe grinned and gave the girl a hug. She was clearly surprised at the contact and didn't return it but she didn't push Chloe off either. That was something. "I'm Chloe".

"Hi Chloe, I'm Beca."

"Hi Beca, we're going to be friends!"

"We are?" Beca looked confused by this, Chloe chose not to mention how adorable she looked again, she suspected it wouldn't go down well.

"Yes."

"Oh…okay then."

* * *

**Eleven**

"Why not?"

"How will we climb?"

"If we build it right at the top then we can climb to it!"

"I just don't see why you want a tree house so bad, we're getting a bit old now aren't we?" Beca sighed and ran her hand through her hair, a sure sign that she was upset.

"I just…I want a place to go that my dad can't get to." Chloe felt the guilt rise up in her as she understood. It had been five years since Beca had come into her life and not once had Beca had a visit from her dad…until two weeks ago, now it seemed the only thing on the man's mind was spending time with Beca. A nice sentiment if it weren't preceded by years of abandonment and neglect.

After the divorce, Beca and her mother had moved into Beca's grandmother's house. The day she and Chloe had met was the day they moved in when the only thing on Beca's mind was how she didn't want to be here, how she wanted to be back in the city with her mother _and_ her father.

She'd revealed to Chloe that she was happy to let Chloe declare them friends that day because she'd been upset for days about it and Chloe was the first thing that had successfully distracted her from the situation. "It's just…even when I come to your house now, he gets mum to ring and ask for me back or he comes to pick me up and I can't stay at yours forever you know?"

"Okay, a tree house it is…I want a swing too though!"

"I thought we were too old for that stuff now?"

"Beca Louise Mitchell, you can never be too old for a tyre swing."

"I still don't know how you found out my middle name."

"I have my ways."

* * *

**Fifteen**

"Guess what tomorrow is?"

"I don't know." Beca stared at her in confusion, Chloe still had yet to muster the courage to tell Beca just how cute she found the smaller girl when she pulled that expression.

"Oh come on Becs, think about it!"

"Nope. No idea." Really, it just made Chloe want to gather Beca up in her arms and never let her go every time she saw that face.

"It's our anniversary!"

"It's our what?!" Beca spluttered.

"Our anniversary of the day we met, remember silly?"

"Oh…oh yeah, I totally forgot." Beca looked slightly crestfallen at that, Chloe knew she had to move quickly to reassure her. For some reason Beca was always convinced she was a bad friend somehow and that she'd done something to screw it up.

"We should do something."

"Like what?" Chloe smiled at Beca's once again happy expression.

"I don't know…maybe we could have a picnic or something?"

"Phew, I thought you were about to say we should go to the movies."

"Pfft, like you'd ever agree to that."

"Actually…there's something I want to check out if you're up for it?" Beca looked down and fiddled with a loose thread on her jeans.

"Sure, what is it?"

"Ummm…so my dad's been telling me stories and stuff about how he and mum used to go walking around the woods when they were teenagers. He said they had this meadow thing where they used to meet up and stuff and…I dunno…I just thought it'd be cool to see. He drew me a map to it." Reaching into her pocket, Beca pulled out a very carefully folded bit of paper with lots of coloured squiggles and arrows on it.

She avoided making eye contact with Chloe as the read headed girl examined the map in front of her. Chloe's heart surged with joy, Beca had been slowly getting to know her dad again recently after years of trying to ignore him. It was inspiring to watch the two slowly reconnect, Beca even spent some weekends with him and her step mother at their house on occasion.

"That sounds wonderful Becs." Chloe said softly as she placed her hand on top of Beca's, rubbing gentle circles with her thumb. Beca looked up at her and Chloe found herself noticing how truly pretty Beca was, especially when she smiled like that, not that little sarcastic smirk she used whenever she just said something witty. No, this smile was a little shy one, like Beca was almost afraid to let Chloe know how happy she was at the time but she couldn't keep herself from smiling completely.

"Chlo? Chloe!" What? Beca was waving her hand in front of her face. When did that happen? "You alright? You kind of zoned out for a minute there…"

"Yeah, I'm fine, I was just thinking…"

"What about?" Sensing Beca wouldn't appreciate her 'Beca is really pretty' revelation, Chloe changed the subject.

"Tomorrow. It's a special occasion, which means smart dress Mitchell."

"What? Aw come on Chlo!" Beca stared in horror at Chloe, remembering the last time Chloe had managed to shove her into a dress…it was pink…with sparkles.

"Nope, don't give me that look, this isn't optional. I'm going to wear that new dress I got last week."

"Well what do I wear?"

"What about those shoes you got for your birthday? They're nice."

"Oh…okay, I can deal with that. No pink dress of death and despair this time?" Chloe just gave Beca an affectionate shove to the shoulder.

The next day they wandered the trail Beca's father had drawn for them, talking the whole way, reminiscing about time spent building the tree house, times in the tree house, Chloe refusing to get off the tyre swing even after an hour Beca pushing her, Beca having to be taken to hospital after Chloe had insisted they could sit on the swing together and she'd promptly fallen off and broken her wrist.

When they reached the meadow, they'd spent an hour lying in it as Beca told Chloe the story of a young man and woman who'd had quickly fallen in love after meeting at sixteen. They were still together when they turned eighteen and truly appreciated what it was to know another person in their entirety after prom night. That revelation led to the arrival of a little girl that neither of them was really ready for.

Believing it was the right thing to do, they'd gotten married but neither had really been happy till the man met the true love of his life six years later and, blinded by how happy he could truly be, he'd left. Chloe held Beca close as she regaled that part of the story. She knew Beca hadn't come to the decision to let her father back into her life lightly and, although their story didn't make everything right, it had made it easier for Beca to see that her father wasn't a villain, just a man with flaws like any other. He hadn't been around when she was younger but he'd more than shown a commitment to trying to make things right in the past few years.

The darkening sky finally prompted them to make their way back to their tree house where they had their picnic set up. The meadow was nice, but it wasn't _their_ place, the tree house was. Once they finished, the two sat side by side in the door of the tree house, feet dangling over its lip. They'd been sitting in contented silence, enjoying the way the fireflies glowed in the slowly dimming light.

"Hey Beca?"

"Hmm?"

"Would you…would you kiss me?"

"What?!" Beca's head spun round to look at Chloe so fast Chloe was worried she might've given herself whiplash.

"Well, it's just…it's just, I have that date with Billy tomorrow and he might want to kiss me."

"How does this involve me exactly?"

"What if I'm really bad at it Beca? What if he's really bad at it? I like Billy and I want to date him but I don't know if I want him to be my _first_ kiss."

"So you want me to be instead?" Beca looked at her incredulously

"I've always though your first kiss should be with someone special, someone who really matters and won't judge you if you get it a bit wrong. I was just thinking about today and how perfect was, how relaxed everything is between us and…there's no one in this world I trust more than you Beca so…kiss me?"

"I…okay." Beca nodded nervously. Then they were leaning in, then their lips were softly brushing, then they pressed gently, but more firmly, together as they became more certain. If this is what kissing felt like, Chloe could certainly see why everyone did it, her chest was vibrating with a slow pleasant buzz she'd not felt before. She liked it.

* * *

Chloe had been fifteen years old when she figured out she was in love with her best friend. It wasn't the moment they kissed, though really Chloe wanted to smack her younger self for not realising it then, it had been a month after she kissed Billy Johnson for the first time. It hadn't felt the same at all, it was awkward and Chloe had to fight the overwhelming urge to wipe Billy's saliva off her chin straight after where he'd somehow missed her mouth.

They'd kept trying though, thinking it would get better with time. It did a bit but it still wasn't nearly on the same level as the kiss with Beca. Chloe pondered this after she returned from her month anniversary celebrations with Billy. He'd taken her to the movies to see Piranha Zombie Annihilator 3, she had been less than impressed. Collapsed on her bed, Chloe had to wonder why it wasn't the same as with Beca?

With Beca, she'd got all those feelings the silly romance novels she liked to read (and that Beca liked to take the piss out of) mentioned when the heroine was kissed for the first time. The feelings you were supposed to have when you kissed your true lo…oh…._oh_. Well that explained a lot.

* * *

**Sixteen  
**  
"You're doing it again."

"Doing what?"

"Staring." Chloe mentally cursed herself, she'd been trying to reign that in.

"I like watching you work."

"It can't be that interesting watching me push a bunch of buttons."

"You can push my buttons any day." Chloe winked, hoping the saucy gesture would disguise the fact that she was actually completely serious.

"Oh god Chloe, that was bad."

"You love it."

"Blegh."

"And you love me."

"Sigh, I suppose I do…weirdo." Chloe hated herself for the glow of warmth in her chest at that moment, to get so happy over that one little admission of love from Beca. It was pathetic really…still, she'd take what she could get.

* * *

**Seventeen  
**  
"Jesus Chlo, could you get any closer?"

"You knew hugs were part of the deal when you entered into this friendship, suck it up Mitchell."

"I know but do you have to be _so_ close?" Sitting up from her position where she'd crawled into the gap between Beca and the sofa she'd been laying on, Chloe surveyed Beca carefully.

"What's the matter? You've never had a problem with cuddle time before."

"It's…I just…" Was Beca blushing? That was new. Chloe felt slightly guilty at maintaining a constant contact policy with Beca but…she just couldn't help it. Snuggling down into Beca's side again, Chloe knew what she was doing was slightly wrong, Beca was her friend and she thought she was participating in innocent cuddle time but really Chloe used these moments to pretend that everything was as she wanted it.

It was so easy to trick herself, huddled up on that sofa with her arms encircling Beca's waist and Beca's arms loosely draped around her own figure, so easy to pretend that she was tucked into the side of her girlfriend. Leaning down to place her head on Beca's chest, Chloe noticed her heart was beating really fast but when Chloe questioned it, Beca mumbled something about having too much coffee and moved the conversation on.

* * *

**Eighteen**

"There had better be a damn good reason for this Beale." Beca grumbled as they trekked their way through the barley field that barely looked as though it had changed since the day the met.

"Lighten up Becs."

"I refuse to lighten up till you tell me why it was necessary to drag me out of bed at two in the morning for a little bit of night time hiking."

"Oh stop being so melodramatic, it's not like you don't usually stay up this late working on mixes anyway." The dirty look Beca gave her was almost enough to make Chloe reconsider her plan but…no, she had to do this one thing. If she could have this one moment then she would lock these stupid feelings away forever and have done with it. "Anyway, you remember when we kissed?"

Beca's eyes snapped wide open at that. Chloe almost had to giggle at the way her mouth opened and closed like a fish before she slowly nodded. "Well, as you know, tomorrow is prom. Prom involves slow dancing and I don't want to get it wrong so I was wondering if you'd help me the same way you helped me with the kissing thing?" In reality, Chloe was actually a very good dancer. She'd helped James and Matthew learn for their respective proms so by now she was quite well versed in the art of a slow dance.

The thing was…she wanted to have a slow dance with Beca, that perfect moment everyone said they experienced at prom with someone they loved. There wasn't anyone she wanted to have that moment with other than Beca though, she didn't feel for anyone the way she did for the scowling woman now standing in front of her. Even if she were to somehow be able to explain away her desire to dance with another girl at prom, Beca had enthusiastically volunteered to DJ for the event, meaning she would be in the booth all night. All she had was tonight.

"Seriously Chloe? We couldn't have done this another time? Before midnight perhaps?"

"I only thought of it just now…" Beca sighed and stepped closer to Chloe.

"Alright then, how are we supposed to dance without mus…you brought your speakers didn't you?" Chloe nodded sheepishly and set the speakers in the rim of the tyre swing they had built so many years ago. A soft strumming guitar made Beca chuckle. "Really Chlo? This song?" Beca smiled as she reached for Chloe's hand, pulling her into a close embrace. They slowly swayed back and forth in time to the beat.

"You know I like Sixpence None The Richer, plus it kind of reminds me of us, with the tree house and your father's map and everything. Look, we've even got the moonlight and fireflies and everything."

"Technically we did the kissing thing too."

"Shut up, you're ruining the moment."

"I'm sorry, you're right…it's actually really nice…" Beca said softly, looking into Chloe's eyes. Knowing she wouldn't be able to hold back if she kept returning Beca's gaze, Chloe dropped her head to Beca's shoulder as they continued to rock from side to side. Losing herself in Beca's warm embrace, Chloe didn't notice she'd begun singing gently along to the song till she whispered the line 'so kiss me' against Beca's ear.

Beca shivered as the song faded into silence and all they were left with was the quiet chirp of the crickets around them. Chloe lifted her head from Beca's shoulder as they came to a halt. Neither let go though. They just stood there in the light of the moon allowing their breath to mingle from the proximity of their mouths.

"Hey Chloe."

"Yes Beca?"

"Kiss me." Beca didn't need to tell her twice.

* * *

_**Thanks to the following for reviewing:  
**__  
__**BardenBellaBeca - I was thinking the frustration had been accumulating over the summer even thoough they weren't actually together...though I reckon it could be done, I mean, have you SEEN Brittany Snow?  
anonp - I know right? It's awesome. Haha, that's cool, I know about as much about football as I do about the chemical composition of the average rock. So...nothing really =P  
Lackluster Brilliance - I'll try not to let you down =) Yeah, I liked it, my mate took me to see it at the imax so it was intense, especially the fight sequences =)  
Okay...so we should just be friends and i'll try to never piss you off...ever, mmkay? Fabulous. Let's do that then. =P  
Guest - I like that the word 'dude' has such a specific meaning in your book ;)**_

Okay, question. Did you ever have a childhood place you liked to hang out/do things? A place you always used to go? For me it was the series of hills/forested area I live at the base of. There's this sort of ridge thing called the North Downs and I basically spent my childhood building all kinds of forts and things up there. I was convinced when I grew up that I was just going to be a hermit who lived in the woods, surviving off the land. To be fair...I do still go up there and camp out if I'm feeling naturey...


	6. I'm Not Alright

_**Hey there everybody. How's life? Want to hear something cool? My lecturer began today by saying "we're going to look at some case studies for the best way to penetrate the market" and without even blinking, the guy next to me yelled "not a good enough reason to use the word penetrate!" so...yeah, I gained a new friend today =)**_

To the people who gave me songs, got an idea for both of them but I like to stay a couple of chapters ahead in case I have issues writing a chapter so they will be appearing soon but neither will be the next fic up. Hope that's okay =)

This chapter as inspired by "I'm Not Alright" by Sanctus Real and "I'm With You" by Go: Audio.

* * *

I'm Not Alright

Gripping the frame even harder between white knuckled fingers, Beca stared angrily at the photo clenched in her grasp. A four year old Beca, squealing with delight as her dad held her upside down over a bright blue sea, stared back. Chloe wandered into their shared living room and spotted the overly rigid posture of her girlfriend currently sitting on the couch.

"Hey babe...you alright?" Chloe said softly as she moved to perch herself next to the tense DJ, gently stroking up and down her arms.

"Yup."

"Beca."

"What?"

"You're lying."

"No I'm not."

"If you grip that frame any harder then you're going to break it."

"No I'm not."

"Beca."

"What Chloe?"

"Look at me." Using her hand to gently steer the DJ's face toward her own, Chloe saw the sadness she expected buried deep in the dark blue eyes now looking into hers. "I know something's wrong with you. Remember who you're talking to okay? You don't need to put your walls up around me." Beca blinked and Chloe saw her refocus and come back from wherever she had let her mind wander off to.

"Sorry, it just still seems safer there sometimes."

"I know sweetie but you don't have to do that anymore, I'm here."

"I know, I'm sorry Chlo."

"It's okay. Now let's try that again shall we? Are you alright?" Turning her head back to look at the picture in front of her again, Beca paused before answering.

"No...I don't think I am."

"What's the matter?"

"Dad."

"What happened this time?"

"That's just it...nothing really. I went to dinner like normal, told him about getting the job at the label and getting this place with you, even that cactus you got me that I haven't managed to kill yet."

"And?" Chloe's eyes pierced her searchingly, knowing there was more than Beca was letting on.

"He just said 'that's great Beca' and asked me if I'd thought about going back to Barden at all."

"Oh..."

"Yeah...I just don't get it. Everything in my life is going as perfectly as it could possibly go...I know it's not the fancy college degree followed by academic career he envisioned for me but...I'm happy, isn't that enough?"

"Babe, I know it's hard but you've got to stop letting him get to you like this."

"That's just it Chlo, I don't think I can. There's just always this thing...this thing inside me, a need to impress him. There's still a part of me that looks at him and sees the man in this photo. He's not though...he's changed and so have I." Staring sadly at the heartbroken expression on the woman in front of her, Chloe moved to hug the unmoving figure whose eyes still hadn't left the photo frame in her hands.

"I think...I think there's a part of me that broke when he left and...when he came back ,instead of letting it heal naturally, we tried to force it...so it stayed broken. We talk and stuff but it's never been the same and I don't think I'll ever stop being broken till I get some distance, some perspective to see him as the man he really is and not the guy I remember from my childhood."

"What are you saying Becs?" watching cautiously as Beca slowly unfurled her fingers from the frame, setting it down on the coffee table in front of her, Chloe felt her heart break a little at Beca's next words, knowing the pain it'd cause her girlfriend.

"I'm saying I'm going to stop talking to him. Until I can stop placing so much hope on impressing him every time we see each other...we shouldn't talk." Chloe just held her tighter as Beca allowed her own words to sink in.

* * *

"Hey Beca, I heard about your dad. I...uh, I hope you're okay...I mean, if you ever want to talk or something I lost my dad too you know...yeah...I just wanted to let you know."

"Thanks Mike but I'm alright, really. I hadn't even really spoken to the guy in about three years so it's not devastating. It sucks but...I'm coping."

"Alright...well, that's good to hear. I just though I better...I don't know, say something."

"Thanks Mike, I appreciate it. Hey, did you manage to get that sound board fixed yet?"

"Yup, all plugged in and ready to go."

"Thank you, that's awesome. You're officially my favourite person on the planet right now."

"I think your fiancée might have something to say about that."

"Haha, I think you're right...don't tell her I said that." Beca gave a cheery wave to the laughing technician now disappearing down the hall. Seeing him round the corner, Beca let the smile drop from her features and tried to swallow down the lump that had suddenly appeared in her throat. It didn't work, it just moved to her chest where it felt like it was ripping her apart from the inside out.

A week ago she had received a call from an unknown number that had turned out to be her sobbing step mother informing her that William Mitchell had been struck by a car earlier that day. The paramedics had done all they could but he was pronounced dead on scene. The next week passed in a blur for Beca. The only thing she was consciously aware of was that she had to stay composed.

It was her decision to stop talking to her father, her decision to cut him out her life, her decision not to respond to his countless messages. When people asked, she brushed it off, told them it was sad but she was alright. She was just fine. Being completely honest, she still felt like she was in a dream. This wasn't supposed to happen, Beca had always meant to reconnect with her father one day but she'd gotten too used to not having to deal with the emotions that came with thinking about him.

Now they threatened to overwhelm her every second of every day, clawing at her insides, tearing her apart at the seams till all she wanted to do was curl up in a ball and cry. Cry for time lost, cry that she didn't try harder, cry that she couldn't honestly say she knew the man she called 'dad' in his final years. On the outside though...Beca smiled, she cracked jokes, she continued with life.

She didn't flinch as she went through the will with the lawyer, she didn't cry as the coffin was lowered into the ground, she crushed the little girl inside of her crying out as she helped Sheila pack up the house and saw the photo of a young man happily swinging his daughter around above a body of water, perched on his bedside table. She didn't have any right to grieve the way she did when she was the one that shut him out.

Beca sighed and resumed a neutral facial expression as she hovered outside of her and Chloe's apartment at the end of her day. She took a moment to recompose herself before making her way inside.

"Chloe? You back yet?" Smiling as her fiancée rounded the corner in her scrubs, Beca felt like a piece of her had just slotted back into place. Even if she was hurting, the knowledge that Chloe was in her life made her outlook on things a lot more optimistic...she had her determined face on though...that never boded well...

"How are you Beca?"

"Uhh...I'm alright, Mike fixed that soundboard toda-"

"Bullshit." Frowning as Chloe crossed her arms and stared angrily at Beca, she wondered what she had done wrong.

"Chloe?"

"I said bullshit Beca. I've let you have your space this past week because I thought that was probably what you needed to deal with this but you're not dealing with it at all."

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Oh cut the crap Beca. You think I don't see through that cheesy little fake grin you do? You think I don't see it every time you have to leave the room to make sure you don't cry in front of me? This isn't good for you Beca. You're putting up your walls again. Don't do that, I'm with you. I'm right here and I know something's wrong with you so don't you dare tell me everything is alright again." Finally something inside of Beca snapped, the stress of the past week, suppressing everything that wasn't a sarcastic quip, finally exploded.

"FINE. You want to hear the truth? Okay then. I'm not fine Chloe, I'm not alright! My father is dead okay? The man who raised me is DEAD. I ignored him for three years, he probably went to his grave thinking I hated him but I didn't. I loved him but now he's gone and I'll never get the chance to tell him that because I'm a stupid selfish bitch."

With that Chloe swept across the room and encircled Beca in her arms, not letting go even though she fought Chloe, struggling to get away. Beca screamed in anger and frustration at the situation, knowing she was helpless to change it but Chloe held on, understanding that Beca was screaming for her inability to change how things had happened with her father. Eventually Beca gave in to the embrace as shuddering sobs wracked her body. Clutching desperately to the woman holding her, Beca cried out every single tear she had held back the past week.

As the tears subsided and Beca fell quiet, exhausted by the emotional release, Chloe guided the dazed girl to the sofa where she rubbed soothing circles on Beca's back.

"I tried Chloe...I tried to keep it all in but...I'm just not that strong."

"I know Becs, that's why I'm here. You don't have to be strong for me, I'm supposed to be strong for you. I'm with you when you're at your weakest and need someone to take care of you."

"I don't know what to do Chlo...I feel like I'm broken inside."

"It's okay sweetie. We'll work through it together."

Beca believed her. No matter what happened, Chloe was always there to take care of her when she was stripped bare with all her emotions laid out to see.

"I'm not alright Chlo, but that's why I need you...because you're the only one who knows how to make me alright again." Chloe just smiled and placed a gentle kiss in Beca's mouth.

And in that moment Beca finally began to heal.

* * *

**_Thanks to all the awesome people who reviewed:_**

hollyhwrites - that's good to hear. I was worried I hadn't done them as children properly =)  
Lackluster Brilliance - You're going to give me a big head soon...that doesn't mean you have to stop though ;)  
Yeah, it was great. Imax is awesome...except when large wasp/bee type things come jumping out the screen and cause you to freak out...I'm not great with wasps, stupid little fuckers. It's fine though, my mate's terrified of spiders and they were on screen waaaay longer. Mwahahaha.  
Damn, you stuck it out for two weeks? Impressive, I gave up after two days because I ran out of Shreddies. Apparently eight year old me thought one box would last me forever =/  
ArcaFeretory - Mango tree? Oooh, fancy. I thought having an apple tree was exciting (I did plant it though...along with my phone, but that's a different story). I'm jealous of your fresh mango supply now.  
Mushy at heart eh? Nothing wrong with that =) And I don't know whether to be scared or impressed at that skill...  
Guest 1 - If you're sure? I need feeding five times a day and regular walks. Also, a big ass wedding cake. I'm talking huge here.  
Guest 2 - Noted and in progress...by which I mean i've written the title on a word doc, but i'll get there.  
sophiekrop12 - Thank you very much, my idea is a bit weird...i'm hoping you'll like it...or I may change it, not sure yet.

Question. What's the stupidest thing you've ever done when drunk? Or just a really stupid mistake for any non alcohol drinkers out there? This could be a very long list for me but I think it's probably the time I ended up making out with my ex and he took it to mean "forget that we're horrible as a couple and shortly heading to uni at opposite ends of the country, let's get back together". It sucked having to tell him it didn't mean that to me at all seeing as we'd just gotten to the point where we were finally starting to be friends again which is what I really wanted.

Further question for any Americans out there, it has recently been brought to my attention that you call apple juice 'cider'. What the fuck do you call cider, the actual proper alcoholic kind, then?!


	7. Hazy

**_Hey guys, sorry for the slowness of the update, bit of a bad week. It rained literally non-stop for most of last week and to someone who has a hole in their only pair of shoes and doesn't have enough money for the bus, it made the walk to/back from uni a bit of a downer. Also, any rugby fans out there will probably know that the Six Nations started this weekend...which means of course I spent the past two days essentially living in a pub and screaming at a large tv/downing ridiculous quantities of beer with my friends._**

Sorry if this isn't up to standard, i've actually been working on a different chapter but it's been proving difficult and this story just sort of wrote itself today while I was listening to this song so I hope it's okay.

This chapter was inspired by 'Hazy' by Rosi Golan feat. William Fitzsimmons.

* * *

Hazy

Restless eyes slowly cracked open as the warm glow of sunlight enveloping the room signalled the start of a new day. Blinking gently, Beca sighed happily as she took in familiar surroundings. Stretching out, she felt her hand collide with another body on the other side of the bed, Chloe must've slept over again. Turning over to greet the red head, Beca was met with the sight of a clearly pajama-less Chloe.

Still in the semi-conscious state between waking and dreaming, it took a moment for memories of last night to slot into place. The reason for that light ache in her muscles and the sheet draped over them being the only source of coverage provided. Beca couldn't hold back a smile as she remembered the way they had moved together, no words, just two bodies perfectly in sync with one another.

She studied Chloe as she slept, the red head's body curled loosely towards her, rising and falling in a steady rhythm that let Beca know it would be a little while before she joined the real world. Not daring to wake her, Beca resettled herself so she could look at Chloe properly. Beca had never considered there to be an absolutely perfect point in her life but this….this could be it.

It would all end as soon as Chloe woke up though, they'd never really defined what this was last night and Beca knew a conversation needed to be had. Things needed to be discuss and that terrified Beca. What if this wasn't anything to Chloe but a night of passion to be forgotten about as soon as she could relocate her clothes and wish Beca a good day?

Since meeting the red head, Beca had slowly been falling deeper and deeper for each one of Chloe's little quirks. Wrapped up in Chloe's inability to stay out of her personal bubble, it had taken Beca some time to understand she really wasn't interested in removing Chloe from that bubble at all. Even before she figured that out, Chloe had subtly been breaking down her walls piece by piece.

So she had given up any pretence of disinterest and let Chloe firmly settle herself in her life, even if only in a friendship capactiy for the time being. As the days progressed, the fine line between friendship and something so much more became increasingly blurred till Beca had to constantly remind herself that it wasn't appropriate to kiss Chloe goodnight.

It had seemed they would continue in that pattern forever more but something had shifted last night. Beca couldn't even remember who made the first move, they'd just been laying in bed together, discussing the events of the day when she turned to look at Chloe and wish her goodnight but was struck speechless by the proximity of Chloe's ridiculously blue eyes. Then there was the gentle brush of lips that had Beca wondering if she'd slipped into another day dream.

She hadn't though, the nervousness with which they moved was evidence of that. In Beca's daydreams, the kisses were hot and heavy and passionate. This was something else entirely. The deliberate movement of their lips against each other was so tender that Beca nearly couldn't breathe with the emotions it caused to come coursing through her system.

They gradually shifted closer to one another, delicate kisses giving way to less innocent ones as Chloe's mouth opened Beca's own to softly stroke their tongues together. Not a single word was said as clothes were cautiously removed, each party frightened that this moment would end and reality would come crashing down.

What followed…well, it was safe to say that Beca wasn't a novice in between the sheets. She'd had plenty of past engagements, some of the disappointing, some of them leaving her satisfied for days afterward, but nothing, _nothing_ had been anything like last night. Even when they were as close as it was possible to be physically, Beca still wanted to be closer, and as they came together, Beca finally felt that sense of completion that let her know there was absolutely nothing between her and Chloe in that moment. There was them and only them.

With a heavy heart, Beca realised that she had made love for the first time. She'd heard people say it was different having sex with someone you loved but she still couldn't get over just how much of a good different it was. Still, one thing was certain now, she didn't just like Chloe, she loved her. Chloe now had the power to destroy Beca in a way no one else ever could.

Beca tried to regain that sense of blissed out contentment she had when she woke but now paranoid thoughts were running on a loop in her head. She almost couldn't bear it as a pessimistic voice in the back of her head went through the multitude of ways Chloe could break her heart, stomp on it, then break it a little bit more, even without meaning to. Then there was that other voice that tiny little ray of hope that whispered to Beca that Chloe could be the one. The one who could remind Beca who she was when Beca herself didn't know.

Being as guarded as she was, Beca never expected to find someone who could know her the way Chloe did. She certainly wasn't a perfect human being, she was prone to snapping at people when she got mad and was more than happy to descend into a grumpy silence rather than try to talk a problem out. That had been the ruin of many of her past relationships and now Beca was frozen in fear at the thought that such behaviours could drive Chloe away…they hadn't yet though, that was something at least.

As Beca allowed all the times Chloe had been there for her to float through her head, her hand instinctively sought out Chloe's and threaded their fingers together. Chloe let out a satisfied sigh as her eye lids parted to let in soft rays of sunlight that were only slightly dulled by the thin curtains of the room. Watching as Chloe's eyes slowly came into focus and settled on Beca's own features, Beca waited with bated breath to see what would happen next.

"Hi." Even though it was spoken at barely more than a whisper, Beca could hear the awareness in Chloe's voice. She knew exactly the position they were in and the single word that had slipped from her mouth held a million different questions that Beca didn't know how to answer.

"Hi." Silence enveloped the two after Beca returned the gesture. Unable to deal with the intensity of Chloe's gaze, Beca's eyes dropped to focus on their hands which were now rubbing gentle pattern against each other. Both of them remained quiet, neither of them wanting to be the first to speak. Chloe broke first.

"I…I've never done that before." Beca could hear the hesitancy…the honesty in her voice. She looked up with confusion.

"Uh…Chloe, when we first properly met, you were in the showers with a guy."

"Don't do that Beca, don't pretend last night was just sex. Sex I've done before. This was different." As she met Beca's stare, Beca could see the worry in her eyes. The fear that Beca would say that was all it was. The emotional barriers she had constructed long ago were screaming at her to say that's exactly all it was but Chloe had always had a way of making her ignore those insecurities.

"I know." A cautious silence fell on the room as their hands slowly stilled. Sighing, Chloe sat up and hugged her knees, making Beca miss the patterns Chloe's fingers had been drawing against her hand.

"Okay, I'm going to be honest here because I don't think I can keep this in any longer. I love you Beca, not just in a friends way either. Last night was amazing and I can't deny I've been wanting it for a while, but it's not what I really want." Beca tried to swallow the lump that had suddenly appeared in her throat that eased with Chloe's next words. "I want an 'us' Beca, not just for the night, but properly. Together. I'm sorry if you wanted to just go back to being friends after last night I don't think I can."

Beca sat up too and mimicked Chloe's position with her arms wrapped around her legs and her shoulder coming close enough to brush against Chloe's.

"I'm scared Chlo."

"What of?"

"Everything. I want that too, so badly, but that's why it's such a bad idea. I've never cared about anyone the way I care about you before. If things go wrong it'll destroy me."

"And that's the problem."

"So maybe….maybe we shouldn't do this, I'm so frightened I'll screw things up. I've never been good with relationships."

"Me either."

"Uh…Chloe, you have a different boyfriend every month."

"Exactly Beca. What does that say about me? Every relationship I've ever been in has just been about fun and casual sex. That is so not what I want from you. I don't want to be saying goodbye to you in a month's time because we've got bored of each other but I have no clue how to avoid that because it's all I know about being with someone else!" Shocked by Chloe's revelation, Beca stayed quiet while she mulled things over. She'd always thought of Chloe as the queen of all social interaction, she made it seem so easy. For the first time it occurred to her that she wasn't the only one going into this blind.

"So…basically, neither of us have any clue what we're doing."

"Nope." Not knowing how to look at Chloe while she said what she really felt, Beca lent her head against her shoulder.

"I don't want to lose you Chlo. Things just don't seem…quite right when you're not around. It's like everything's just a bit hazy or blurred, then you appear and things get clear again." Beca felt a huge sense of relief as Chloe's head came to rest gently against her own.

"I feel the same way about you. It's weird, I'm used to being able to forget about people after a while but with you…I just don't know how to be without you anymore." Feeling far more confident than she had since the start of their conversation, Beca reached out and joined her hand with Chloe's once more.

"You know me better than anyone Chlo and I think….I think if anyone knows how to make me a better person…it's you, you make me want to be the best version of myself I can be to make you happy and maybe…maybe that's enough." Finally getting the courage to lift her head and look into Chloe's eyes, Beca's heart beat slightly faster in fear of the uncertainty she saw there.

"I'm worried about what the future holds Becs, I've read all the sappy romance novels out there, each one of them has an example of how a relationship can come crashing down and I'm petrified that we could become one of those stories but…but I know how I feel about you right here in this moment and as long as I remember that…I think we'll be okay."

The now assured look in Chloe's eyes caused Beca to lean forward and press their lips firmly together. They both sank into the kiss that was saying everything they had been unable to completely articulate in the past few moments. It felt so right…like coming home. Eventually they broke apart. Eyes still closed, they kept their foreheads resting against one another, not ready to lose contact yet. After a pause of simply enjoying her proximity to the older girl, Beca chuckled and drew back so she could look into Chloe's face.

"So we're doing this then?"

"Yeah…I hope you realise I don't know where to go from here."

"Me either, we can figure it out together though." Chloe turned to look at their intertwined hands.

"Together….I like the sound of that."

* * *

_**Thoughts? Anyways, thanks to the following for reviewing:**_

anonp - Right, challenge for next time then, I aim to get two tears out of you =P And at least it was only a day, would've been worse if he'd had time to get invested in the relationship =/

_**ArcaFeretory - Trust me, with my mother, good grammar is not optional. Using 'gonna' around the woman is tantamount to suicide. I'm still going to take that high five though. *high five* =P  
Nah, had to dig the tree back up to retrieve it then replant the thing, that was a fun couple of hours...reckon if I left it there I could have grown an Apple tree? Like the technological kind? That'd be cool. Free iPods for all! Except it was a Nokia...  
If it's any consolation, i'm going home next weekend and my dad's giving me a pneumatic drill to try and remove our stairs. I'll destroy them that little bit more, just for you. I shall avenge your bones! =)**_

_**Guest 2 - Duuude, your prompt has slightly exploded in my head. It's led to the creation of a two-shot that will be appearing very soon, I hope you're happy...no seriously, I hope you are, I went off on a bit of a tangent...**_

jasper37 - Thanks for helping clear that up, i'll make sure I specify i'm after the alcoholic kind if I ever visit America

wishgrantingfactories - I'm glad you enjoyed it, I went off some past experiences to try and get that right, fortunately my own dad is still very much alive and kicking and busy being an awesome dad but...yeah, I know what it's like to wish you could go back and fix something which is what I wanted to show with Beca.

_**Lackluster Brilliance - Okay, first things first, I've just got to give you a hug for the length of this review. Seriously, it's awesome. =)  
Well aren't you a regular bad ass? I know I can handle myself pretty well in the wild but that's on a whole other level. If ever there's a zombie apocalypse, i'm going to hike it to America and follow you around, you seem like you know what you're doing. (It's cool though, I'll totally bring a bat for all the zombie killing)  
Thanks, not the easiest topic to write about but i'm glad to see it worked and i'm not just being a morose weirdo =)  
Oooh, i've done the roof jumpy one too! Put a trampoline underneath just in case it didn't work...that didn't pan out. Went sailing into the next door neighbour's garden...and into their greenhouse...that was just a wee bit painful...**_

And thanks to all who explained the apple juice/cider issue.

Question time!  
Anybody got any crazy family traditions? My family has a tonne but I think the biggest is probably this 'rite of passage' thing my dad's side of the family has. Basically he's Cumbrian (Cumbria is as far North as you can get while still being in England, it borders Scotland) which means a lot of family holidays spent in Cumbria/Scotland mountain climbing. When we turn 18 he takes us to Skye (island off the North coast of Scotland) which is known for, surprise surprise, big ass mountains, and we see how many we can climb in a week. My sister Alex managed four, my brother Fergus managed a half (it was only a small rock slide that crushed his leg, jeez, what a wimp =P) and I managed five, I was pretty proud of myself for that. Plus I got a tenner out of my dad because he bet me I couldn't keep my head under this mountain stream we went swimming in for more than 20 seconds. It was about 0 -1 degrees Celsius in there (32/33 ish to Fahrenheit users). That's actually where my little dp thing is from, that's a shot of me emerging and swearing violently. Rambled on a bit here...only happened this summer and i'm still riding the high from this, i've been told this was something I had to do since i've been born.


	8. Never Had

_**Exciting news chaps...or chappettes, whatever works for you, this is the first part of a two shot. Guest 2 requested 'I Drive Your Truck' by Lee Brice and I felt the story that came charging into my head would be better delivered as a two parter. The next chapter is actually the one that will be based on 'I Drive Your Truck', bit of a sneak preview there but I hope to have it up by tomorrow anyway so not too much of a biggie.**_

This chapter was inspired by 'Never Had' by Oscar Isaac, 'What Hurts The Most' by Rascal Flatts and 'Sweet Dream' by Greg Laswell.

* * *

Never Had

Chloe's face screwed up in pain as she tried to control another wave of tremors that passed through her body. The seizures gripping her came to a gradual fade and Chloe had a very depressing thought. She was going to die here. Here, on this thin, grotty blanket in a barely standing shed in the middle of Afghanistan.

Certainly not the way she'd pictured it, she'd hope more for a soft bed, surrounded by loved ones at a ridiculously old age. That wasn't going to happen though, even if a miracle occurred and they managed to escape from where they had been pinned down by enemy fire for what seemed an age, Chloe had been a doctor on the front line long enough to recognise the signs of infection.

Her blood was slowly turning to poison and oozing into her system, shutting everything down as it went. Immediate medical care still wouldn't be able to rid Chloe of the disease now plaguing her. It wasn't supposed to be like this. Four years at Barden, then four years in the field, then straight back home to pick up her life from before. That's what she had naively thought when the military offered to pay for her university tuition fees…but no, this dusty hut was to be the last chapter in her life.

All those regrets…Chloe had hoped for at least another fifty years but fate has a habit with screwing with our life plans under the best of circumstances and Chloe Beale had drawn the short straw. So long…she'd been here so long she'd almost forgotten everything about why she was here, how she'd even gotten into this situation. Still the image of blue eyes and a smile that rarely appeared in place of a smirk haunted Chloe's thoughts. An image from a past life that she wouldn't ever forget.

She couldn't forget, even if she'd wanted to, when that smile had appeared it was all Chloe saw. She wished now desperately that she could go back and talk to the girl, so scared of voicing her love, and tell her just how stupid it was to hold back in the grand scheme of things. The girl that Chloe had once been had assumed there would always be time. How wrong she was.

She supposed there was one advantage to all this, in the midst of a delirious fever she could swear she heard the sound of keys scraping in a lock and a short figure slowly approaching her bedside to whisper comforting thoughts in the dead of night. For a short time it was like she'd never left. Then her fever broke and she was brought back to the reality of thumping boots and explosions that made the entire structure rattle with the force. A creaking whine from the door alerted her to the fact that she was no longer alone in her musings.

Chloe smiled as Aubrey appeared at her side and began inspecting the wound on her leg once more. Aubrey had never been much good with expressing herself but the way she kept appearing to try and treat Chloe's leg spoke volumes. She was just as aware of the situation as Chloe was but that didn't stop her from repeatedly checking, hoping in vain that Chloe had pulled off some miraculous recovery. Anyone could tell from Chloe's abnormally pale demeanour and the constant sheen of sweat that covered her brow that things weren't looking good for the red head, but Aubrey felt the need to check every time, just in case.

Aubrey's hands slowly stilled as the evidence in front of her reconfirmed what she didn't want to know. Collapsing to sit beside Chloe, she spotted the small shreds of obviously torn paper scattered by her best friend's makeshift bed.

"Again Chloe?"

"No words ever seem good enough."

"You'll have to find some soon if you want to finish it before…" Chloe smiled faintly as Aubrey tensed beside her, still not quite ready to deal with everything her brain was telling her about Chloe's condition. The smile dropped from her lips as a slight catch in her throat caused her lungs to heave with a renewed determination to expel the mucus now lodged in them.

Aubrey rubbed her back gently as the last few coughs wracked her body. Chloe's breath came in rasps as she laid down against the blanket, her mind now whirling with all those memories, all those opportunities she now wished she had acted on. This was her last chance to take one of those opportunities and she still couldn't find it in herself to do it.

"What do I say Aubrey? Three years we've been here and every single day I've thought about what I'd put in this letter, all the things I want to say to her. I still don't know where to begin."

"You could always try 'hey there midget'" Aubrey smirked down at me. The chuckle in Chloe's throat quickly turned into another coughing fit that eventually receded.

"I don't know Bree. She…she was so _angry _when I told her. What if she doesn't want to hear from me?"

"I think she would, you weren't the only one dishing out love struck glances when we were at Barden you know?"

"I know." Something about the certainty in Chloe's voice caused Aubrey to pause.

"What do you mean?"

"She…she came to me on graduation day. Told me she didn't want me to leave. Told me she loved me."

"What?! Then…I don't understand."

"I told her about how we got into Barden on a scholarship on the condition we serve four years in the army as doctors and she got angry I hadn't told her."

"Yes, I know that bit. I thought that was the reason you stopped speaking? You left out the whole love confession bit, was that when you stopped speaking?"

"No." Aubrey had to strain to hear Chloe's next words as her voice became thick with tears. "She visited the apartment, a couple of days before we left. She said she'd had a chance to calm down a bit, she told me it didn't matter, that it didn't change anything for her, she still wanted me."

"What did you do?" Aubrey's voice had an edge to it that Chloe didn't want to face.

"I thought I was doing the right thing. I didn't want her to be stuck waiting around on me when I knew how desperate she was to go to LA."

"Chloe, _what did you do?"_

__"I told her I didn't feel the same. She…she didn't say anything, she just…she left. We stopped talking after that." Aubrey closed her eyes and sighed.

"I love you Chloe, but you can be a real idiot sometimes."

"I know, I came so close to calling her back. There were so many things I wanted to say…but I just watched her walk. I really thought it was the best thing to do for her, she had so much she was going to do, I couldn't ask her to put it on hold for me."

"She would have…if you'd asked." Tears gathered at the corners of Chloe's eyes as she whispered

"How could I have known Bree? There was no warning for this. I just…I just wish I had one chance to go back and tell her." Chloe rolled onto her side, facing away from Aubrey as the tears consumed her once again, making her incapable of doing anything but emitting quiet sobs.

"You can't go back, but you can still let her know." Aubrey said quietly before she reached for the small scrap of dirty brown material that passed for paper and placed it by Chloe's side as she cried. Giving Chloe's shoulder one last affectionate squeeze, she left the musty room to check the perimeter once more.

* * *

Dear Beca,

I can't describe to you the things I've seen these past three years. So much war, so much destruction, certainly a far cry from Barden. This simple letter seems pointless in the midst of everything yet it's possibly the most important thing I've ever done. There are times when I wondered if there was even any point going back. I couldn't imagine how there could be happiness in the world when I'd seen so much suffering. Then I remembered the look on your face when I told you we'd be fast friends.

I lied to you that day, when I said I didn't love you. I did Beca, I still do. I often think of what our lives would have been like if I had told the truth that day. What it would have been like if we had been together. I'm getting sicker though and I've come to realise this will never happen as much as I wish otherwise.

Sometimes I have this dream about us, you just sort of appear in front of me and I know that we're together and we're happy. The details change all the time but those two things are always there, no matter what happens. It makes me hate daylight so much. I want to stay in that sweet dream forever but the sunlight rips it all away and reminds me that you've never been mine the way you are in my dream. I don't think I've ever wanted something so badly as I do in the moments when I wake up and realise it's all not true.

I appreciate this confession comes several years too late, you've probably long since moved on and I'm just embarrassing myself by reminding you of a college romance that never was, but I'm running out of time to do all the things I wanted to do with my life so if you will please allow me this one indulgence.

There's one thing I need you to know, you mean everything to me Beca. Thoughts of you and our time together at Barden are what gives me the strength to go on. The possibility that maybe I could fix things between us one day, be given a second chance, kept me going. I never expected you to wait around for me, I actually hoped you didn't, that's why I lied that day. I wanted you to get on with your life and, now more than ever, I hope you do.

You once promised me that you weren't going to stop until your name was on every radio station in the country, then the world. I hope you keep that promise, it warms me to think of your music inspiring others the way it always inspired me. In the moments where I saw no end in sight and I honestly couldn't consider doing anything but giving up, your voice from that day in the shower rang out to me and pushed me forwards.

I miss you, god, you have no idea how much I miss everything about you. My memories are all I have left now but they are still more than I could have remotely hoped for when I walked into your shower that day. You were the best thing I never had and I owe you more than you could ever know.

With all my heart,  
Chloe.

* * *

_**Thanks to the following for reviewing:**_

Lackluster Brilliance - I know them feels bro, never know quite how to handle things =/  
Correction, hugs are awesome. I'm a hugger, can you tell? And you started the whole lovely review thing, so technically i'm returning the favour =P So basically, never mess with you...ever? Did I get that right? My mate is obsessed with zombie apocalypse, she's had us doing training sessions since we were 15...apparently I'm going to be the one that dies in a tragic blaze of glory and fire arms...and who doesn't love Zombieland (though I'm totes Tallahassee =P)

tennis8 - I'm glad you liked that line, I just threw it in on my final read through because I thought it sounded about right =P

ArcaFeretory - Haha, my mate sometimes sends me incredibly grammatically incorrect texts to see if she can make my head explode, she's getting better at it too D=  
Hurrying to class, best way to go ;) You should definitely write your name on every single yellow line, just so everyone knows it's in honour of you...  
Beach at Christmas? That sounds awesome...if a little chilly...my dad usually drags us hill walking on Christmas, beach sounds a lot nicer. Hills have mud. Lots of mud. To be fair, the mountain thing is probably as exciting as it gets...the next most exciting tradition we have is when we pick my dad up, flip him upside down and make him walk on the ceiling while we sing 'Spiderpig'...we're a weird family...  
Oddly enough, the first time I wrote it, the word 'gentle' was in there eleven times. I had to find a thesaurus to stop myself using it so much =P

Guest 2 - Soooooo, thoughts? I know this isn't technically what you prompted yet but the next one relies heavily on this for back story so...yeah. I'm anxious to know if it's what you're after, i've never done a prompt before o.O  
And the Guest 2 thing, I think it's coz originally there were two people by the name of 'guest' who reviewed and I didn't want to get confused? I don't know, anyways, you happy to have that as your very own super special nickname or would you prefer to be called something else, i'm open =)

sophiekrop12 - Your enthusiasm makes me happy ^^

cjba - How you liking the Bechloe ship so far then? Worth sticking around for? =P  
And thank you for the kind words, Chapter 5 was one of my favourites too, I actually wrote most of it in the car on my hone while I was waiting for my mum to come out of the dentist's =P  
Oooh, think i've got a pretty good idea for that one, got to finish this prompt, do another one and get a story i've nearly finished uploaded before I can get to it though. Btw, you sent me on a massive Blink-182 binge, I hope you're happy. Seriously, it's been three hours and i've yet to listen to a different artist.

Question!

How do people usually describe you? The word 'loyal' tends to come up a lot around me which is nice, though it's usually followed by 'like a puppy' which i'm not sure how to feel about...maybe it's the wetting myself on the furniture... ;)  
There's very little I won't do for the people I care about.


	9. I Drive Your Truck

_**Alright, part two. I promise a happier one next time but this had to be done. Guest 2, this is for you.**_

Also, might be a small delay for the next chapter. Back home for the weekend without my laptop and we're destroying my kitchen/stairs so i'm going to be pretty busy for a bit. On the plus side, i'm getting paid to swing a sledgehammer and use a pneumatic drill, what more can a girl really ask for in life?

This chapter was inspired principally by 'I Drive Your Truck' by Lee Brice but 'Love How It Hurts' by Scouting For Girls, 'Coming Back Down' by Hollywood Undead, 'Tonight' by FM Static and 'Ghosts On The Dancefloor' by Blink-182 were also used. I would recommend listening to any/all of these songs if you feel like getting emotional.

* * *

I Drive Your Truck

Dear Chloe,

I honestly have no idea why I'm writing this letter. What's the point? You're dead and there's nothing I can do about that. I know what I'm supposed to be doing, I should be moving on, rebuilding my life or some shit like that. I can't though Chlo, I just can't. It's too damn hard. I feel like I died too, like I'm not even a person anymore, like I'm not Beca Mitchell. I've become just another face in the teeming masses of people on the streets. I can't escape from the memories I have of us or the dreams of what we could have been.

I didn't think it was possible to miss someone so much, or that it would hurt so bad knowing that it's not just distance that separates us now. Sometimes I look at the stars and imagine you're up there somewhere. You know I never believed in a god or heaven or anything like that but recently I find myself trying to. I even pray sometimes. The idea that you could still exist, can still hear me in any way is too tempting to ignore and the thought that you could never know how much I love you is simply too much to bear.

It's silly really, I always thought you couldn't be real. It took some time for me to see that it wasn't an act at all, you are were genuinely that kind and giving. I've been so used to people leaving me or lying to me all my life that I had trouble getting used to the idea that you never wanted anything from me except for me to be me. It wasn't just me either, I think the only time I saw you be mean to someone was when the old captain of the Bellas came back and told me that I wasn't a real Bella or capable of leading them. You were scary that day, Lily level scary.

Other than that, I can't recall a single time you treated anyone with anything but unrelenting kindness. You were too good for this world and now you're not in it anymore. The irony almost makes me want to laugh, then I remember that I don't do that anymore and I cry instead. I hate crying and I want to hate you for leaving me, can't though. You know that, but it's so difficult not to nowadays. I just don't know what to do with myself anymore.

The only time I even feel sort of vaguely right is when I go driving in your truck (your parents said they didn't want it, hope you don't mind). We spent so many nights just driving around in that thing talking that it's a little bit easier to picture you still sitting beside me and complaining about the gas mileage for the millionth time. Then there was the time you got so mad at me for snorting coffee all over the dashboard when you told me that story about you proposing to Cinderella at Disneyland when you were eight. I might've been lying when I said the stain was barely visible.

I guess it's just my way of coping. I remember the first time you dragged me out to go for a drive. I was expecting you to have some cute, sweet little new car that still smelled of that weird pine fresh stuff they spray it with at the dealer's. What I most definitely was not expecting was you to appear in a dirty, beat up truck that had crater sized dents all over it and desperately needed a paint job.

You always did have a way of surprising me. I was almost scared to set foot in it, well, until you called me a baby, then I had to get in it didn't I? Now I hate getting out of the stupid thing. I really wish you hadn't left it in such a mess though, I'm pretty sure that bottle of Gatorade you left rolling about on the floor is starting to get mould and I hate those damn dog tags hanging from the rear view mirror that remind me exactly why you aren't here anymore.

I can't bring myself to change it though, you always said a messy car shows character, something I didn't quite get till now. The whole truck is filled with things that are just so _Chloe, _the bizarre assortment of change you kept handy in the ash tray so you always had change to give to the homeless man we saw outside the store, your dirty Braves cap sitting on the dashboard from the time you tried to teach me how baseball works. I may have just started nodding along after a while to appease you, I still don't have a clue what's going on half the time.

I've left everything exactly the way it was the last time I saw you. I know you thought I disappeared off the face of the earth after the last time we spoke but I couldn't handle the thought of not seeing you one last time, so I hid and watched you leave, the last image I have of you is you sitting in your truck. I don't want to tamper with that.

Aubrey keeps asking if I've visited your grave, I know she thinks I'm blocking my emotions or whatever but truth is that I don't see the point. It's just a cold, hard slab of rock. That was never you, you were always so full of warmth and light. A grave just doesn't seem right. The truck does though, it's filled with memories of you. That's why I drive it all the time, I never feel as close to you as I do when I've got the windows rolled down and I let rip in a backfield somewhere with that weird country channel you always listened to playing. I swear to fucking god I can sometimes hear you laughing.

I think what gets to me the most is knowing you went to your grave thinking that I wasn't completely and utterly 100% in love with you. I've been yours since day one Chloe, how could you not notice? I never let anyone in the way I did you. I'm trying to pretend everything's fine and that I'm slowly moving past this but truth is I don't think I'm ever going to be able to move past you. I would've moved heaven and earth for you and it sucks because I never even had the opportunity to try.

It fucking kills me that I walked away that day. I was so scared, so scared I'd imagined the entire thing in my head. I spent so many nights wondering why on earth someone so crazily perfect would want anything to do with me and when you said you didn't love me, all those little insecurities hit me again. I let them rule my head and I didn't fight for you the way I know I should have.

A part of me always thought I'd have the chance to fix it I guess, like you I was clinging to the hope that there was a future for us when you came back. Only problem with that being you didn't. I wish you had. I really, really, really wish you had. I just want you to be here with me, is that so much so ask? I needed... _need_ you to know that you were it for me, the one, soul mate, whatever the fuck you want to call it. CR's been trying to set me up with some people that past couple of years but it never works out. None of them screw with my head the way you always did. I've been trying to move on from you since you left all those years ago, you pretty much destroyed me for anyone else. In a good way, the best way really. All the times I think I'm finally starting to mend, you flash through my head and I'm wrecked again.

All part of the journey though I guess. For now, I'm going to try and keep my promise. I'm going to become the best DJ in the goddamn world. That way, if there is some sort of afterlife, I can go meet you knowing I did everything I could to make you happy. I'm already working on it, I've got a manager and everything. Admittedly it's Aubrey (she said being a doctor didn't seem so appealing after watching you die and not being able to do anything, I can understand that) but I reckon we can make it work. I think she wants to help me keep that promise to you, she's worried i'm going to sink into a spiral of depression and never do anything with my life. Truth be told I probably would have if she hadn't given me your letter. I still nearly do sometimes.

The other night I was DJing at a gig Aubrey managed to get me and it was going pretty well till I played my Titanium mix, you know, the one you always insisted I finish with? I'm still convinced you were on the dance floor. I saw you dancing to that track so many times I managed to convince myself I saw you. It felt so real, I would happily swear under oath that you were there, looking into my eyes and making me feel better than I had since that mind numbing moment I saw Aubrey appear alone at my door with a stupid little scrap of paper that broke me inside.

Of course, it had to end and when it did I wanted to die, it fucking hurt like hell. I nearly gave up but Aubrey came over, handed me the keys to the truck and a few minutes behind the wheel of the thing was all I needed to remember why I'm still trying. Driving your truck reminds me that you are always worth trying for, that hasn't changed just because you're not here anymore.

Otherwise, the best thing I can do is just to focus on how you're still around even though you're not. I can still see you in the people you met. The way Amy now uses 'totes', Lily's sudden baseball obsession or Ashley's research into new nodes treatments. You're everywhere in the people around me, I have to trust that you're still in me the same way. I know you changed me so much in the short time we knew each other and in that way you'll never truly be gone. For now, that has to be enough.

All my love and then some,  
Beca.

P.S. At least I got to see you naked once.

* * *

_**I've got to commend you guys on the speediness of the reviews. I uploaded the last chapter, went to brush my teeth, came back, four reviews. That's impressive and you guys rule. Anyways, thanks to the following for reviewing:**_

_**Lackluster Brilliance - Good second part? Yes? No? Chloe died, that has to count for something right?**_  
_**Uhhh...I punched a guy once? That's about it so I'm going to go ahead and say you're Tallahassee. To be honest, i'm actually pretty damn mellow, it takes a lot to get me angry. I've been told I'm pretty scary when I'm angry but it doesn't happen often. Last time it happened was when I found out my best mate's boyfriend had cheated on her (hence the punching).**_  
_**Wouldn't that make you 'sexy psycho killer' then? =P**_

_**ballpointmf - Thank you, hope all the recent angst hasn't put you off =)**_

_**ArcaFeretory - Exactly, real friends are always the ones who mess with you...probably why my best friend I spend the majority of our time insulting each other. No punctuation? Daaaaamn, I've seen some horrifying use of punctuation before but at least it was there, your ability to deal with that makes you awesome. Well done.**_  
_**Ahh, Australia. I had a friend move out there a couple of years ago, she likes to send me pics of gloriously sunny beaches whenever I complain about the weather ¬.¬ And your family sounds pretty awesome too, though I think if my family spontaneously burst into song, we'd be killed before we reached the chorus. My sister can sing, the rest of us? ...not so much =P (weird makes life more interesting, just saying)**_  
_***Hugs thesaurus happily* My precioussssss...**_  
_**I get told I need to get out more sometimes...my friend keeps trying to ween me off video games, she's not gotten very far ^^ and I can definitely agree with that last bit =)**_

_**anonp - Sorry, still sad for this one. I promise the next one will be happy, I think I need to get off the angst for a bit =/**_  
_**Well at least they're saying you're smart! =)**_

_**Guest - ...I feel like i've hurt you, i'm sorry. Would you like a hug?**_

_**Guest 2 - Okay, you are officially Guest 2 now, no one may take this title from you =P**_  
_**Anyways, what di you think? Did you like it? Slightly terrified i've killed this for you o.O**_

_**sophiekrop12 - Thank you, especially for the 'aca-awesome', that's a pretty serious compliment =P**_  
_**I've started work on your prompt and it's either going to be the next chapter or the one after, I don't want to rush it and get it wrong =)**_

_**cjba - I know what you mean. Regret is a pretty powerful emotion, always leaves you thinking about all the what if's. Particularly if someone you know has died, it's so hard to stop thinking about what could have been done differently =/**_  
_**I know, first time I saw Pitch Perfect I didn't even see the Bechloe and now i'm like 'was I blind? Seriously, eye sex everywhere' =P**_  
_**Blink-182 rule, end of discussion ;)**_  
_**I'm the same, it takes a long time for me to trust someone completely and utterly but once I do they are someone I would do anything for.**_

_**Question!**_

_**Who is the person most important to you who isn't an immediate family member? Mine is my best friend Ellie, we've known each other for fourteen years at this point and i'm honestly really not sure what i'd do without her. I don't know how to keep secrets from her, when I was first starting to suspect I wasn't entirely straight I was just like 'okay, let's just bottle this up, not tell anyone ever and hope it'll go away' then she came round mine for a movie night and I told her how I was feeling in the first five minutes. I think it also says a lot that pretty much everyone says we fight like an old married couple...not kidding...everyone...including my old headmistress...**_


	10. Crush

_**Hey everyone, sorry about that brief hiatus, completely unintentional I assure you. I've actually been in hospital/recovering, during our DIY kitchen destruction my brother was trying to knock down a wall and unfortunately he succeeded just as I walked past it so...yeah...a wall fell on me. I got off pretty lightly all things considered but I did get a fairly decent concussion and a dislocated shoulder out of it so i've been taking things kind of easy and anytime I try and do anything vaguely strenuous my brother forcibly makes me lie down and crams food down my throat. I think he feels guilty but I'm not going to complain that boy can cook better than Jamie Oliver.  
Anyway, I wrote this chapter a little while ago but never got round to finishing it so I thought this would be a good place to start trying to get back into the swing of things. I'll try and post some more soon but the beginning of March is when pretty much all my coursework essays are due in and i'm still trying to cope with the fact that I can just be mildly headachey one minute and the next i'm on the floor wondering how the hell I got down there and why it feels like someone is jamming an ice pick into my head. So basically updates could be slow until I get the things relevent to my education out of the way. With that being said, no more prompts for a little bit guys, not until i've caught up on the ones given to me which would be; guilty as charged, after midnight, the only exception and crash my party...I think that's all of them, if i've missed one then let me know.**_

This chapter was inspired by 'Crush' by Urban Delights and 'I Can't Read You' by Daniel Bedingfield. Also, I make reference to a piano piece during a flashback, for that I had 'Le Onde' by Ludovico Einaudi (the single, not the album) in mind.

* * *

Crush

Chloe Beale. How does one begin to describe Chloe Beale? Some might say 'perfection' is too mediocre a word to compare with the ever glowing light that radiated from Chloe's eternal soul…..admittedly the people who said that were members of the school's Romantic Poet Society who had trouble ordering a coffee without the use of at least three metaphors and a contradicting insight into the complexities of the human soul.

Still…they had a point. There was just something about Chloe. She was involved in everything at Barden High, from the trophy winning track team to the trophy winning chess team…there were usually a lot of trophies where Chloe was involved, and the normal boundaries of friendship circles didn't seem to apply to her. She flitted from clique to clique with an effortless social grace that astounded her peers and made her the object of desire for many a hormonal young teenager.

Students and teachers alike thought this was down to Chloe's personality that somehow seemed to mesh perfectly with every person she came into contact with. They were wrong. Truth of the matter was simply that Chloe could read people as easily as one would a book. Two minutes of conversation was all that was required for Chloe to figure exactly what she had to say to make that person like her, which she then did. That's not to say she lied about who she was or faked any part of her personality, it just meant that she was good at picking up on a person's interests and hearing someone talk about something they were truly passionate about fascinated Chloe.

What surprised many members of the student population was the odd mismatch of people Chloe had selected for her main friendship group at the school. No one could figure out the common denominator, especially with overachiever and notorious debate team leader Aubrey Posen (who had once managed to make the principle cry over a school council discussion about the rising prices of milk in the cafeteria) taking pride of place as Chloe's best friend, but every single one of them obviously held something Chloe found interesting enough to hang around with on a daily basis. The answer was simple enough, they surprised Chloe with their distinctive personalities. Something very few at Barden High were able to achieve.

For those not in Chloe's immediate circle, she was an enigma, something to be pursued and lusted after. There was no doubt about it, Chloe Beale was wanted. It was a fact of life for Chloe that people would ask her out. She didn't have to display an interest in anyone, if someone intrigued her then she paid more attention to them than usual and this often resulted in the recipient party of Chloe's interest asking for something more. If someone appealed to Chloe, she simply waited for them to ask.

Maybe that was conceited but that was how things worked for her. She liked everyone she said yes to, sure, she wouldn't have gone out with them if she didn't, but she'd never felt that sense of longing for someone, everyone eventually became too easy to figure out and she still found herself yearning for the type of interest in someone that would have her going to ridiculous lengths to get someone's interest, the way she had witnessed her friends doing so.

Right now, all attempts at flirting and the such like just seemed silly and preposterous to Chloe. With that being said, Chloe was woefully inadequate in one area of normal social conduct. She had absolutely no idea how to handle having a crush.

* * *

"Is she looking yet?"

"No."

"How about now?"

"Nope…to be honest, I think you could do a naked pole vault down the middle of the cafeteria and she still wouldn't look away from that laptop." Chloe groaned and lent forward on the table so she had perfect position with which to repeatedly bang her head against it. Aubrey quickly grabbed her and hauled her into an upright position. "Now now, there's no need for that."

"Yes there is. She hasn't looked at me. Not even once Aubrey. I can't remember the last time that happened." Chloe said in a pathetic voice that could only really be described as a whine.

"That's because it's never happened dearie."

"Oh…so why is it happening now?"

"Honestly? I have no idea." Chloe sighed and stared at the new girl across the cafeteria. Chloe honestly couldn't recall a single time she'd had such an interest in someone before with next to no effort on their part. She hadn't even given Chloe her name! It was something Chloe had had to ask around for, something that was unheard of in the halls of their school. Chloe Beale was pursued, she didn't pursue. As Beca's gaze lazily swept across the cafeteria to land on Chloe's, she gave small smile that had the red head grinning idiotically back…before realising exactly what she was doing and hurrying to look very absorbed by her maths textbook. Chloe now had a newfound respect for all the people who had ever managed to give of a calm, confident appearance when they asked her out. Right now the notion of doing anything calmly near Beca seemed preposterous. Even their first meeting had Chloe reeling for thought.

_Chloe sighed happily to herself as she reached the school in record time. She'd been cycling to school recently in an attempt to promote the Eco Club's new 'Go Green' policy and so far she was finding that it actually gave her a little morning boost. Wandering through the deserted halls, Chloe became aware that, just maybe, she'd arrived a little too early._

_ Her thoughts of what to do with herself till the rest of the school population arrived was cut off by the melodic sound of a piano floating through the halls. It was beautiful. A pattern of notes that sounded so simple but so exquisitely beautiful as they flowed together, each individual key hit managing to stand out but still able to glide into the next one with ease. Like a hypnotised child, Chloe's feet moved her forward to the open hall door that was the source of the tune now dancing through Chloe's head._

Entering the main assembly hall, Chloe spied a small brunette girl sitting at the piano, fingers flying smoothly over the keys with not a second's hesitation. The girl's eyes were focused down at her hands, watching the movement with a small smile that looked perfect on her beautiful features. 

_It was odd, she was dressed in very dark clothing, there was enough metal in her ears to set off a metal detector from three miles away and Chloe was pretty sure that grasshopper on her arm wasn't drawn on with Sharpie. Certainly not the image one normally associated with a beautifully performed piece of classical music. _

_Not daring to move any closer to the piano at the other side of the room, Chloe closed her eyes and listened as every note echoed lightly through the large space. It seemed to go on forever, an endless waterfall of harmony that had Chloe relaxing muscles she didn't even know were stressed. In the end though, Chloe could hear the gradual slowing of the rhythm and the gentle fade of the last few notes._

Opening her eyes, Chloe stared in wonder at the girl now carefully pulling the lid over the keys.

"It's rude to stare you know." The girl gently said, her words reverberating through the room to Chloe's ears. What Chloe meant to say in response to that was 'that was the most beautiful piece of music I've ever heard, where did you learn to play like that?' Sadly, what actually came out of Chloe's mouth was far from her original intent.

"Mmmgefluh?"

"Is that your name? Or are you having a seizure? Because my knowledge of first aid extends to grabbing the phone and hitting 911 I'm afraid"

"I-uh…I mean…you?" Chloe nodded as she spoke, confused by the fact that she seemed to have forgotten the entire English language in three seconds flat. Still trying to remember the letters that constituted her name, Chloe didn't notice the girl had grabbed her things and made her way to where Chloe was standing.

"Well…I've got a meeting with the principle now so… guess I'll see you around Mmmgefluh." Winking all too easily at Chloe, the girl made her exit through the main hall doors, leaving Chloe to wonder what the hell had just happened.

__That had been Beca's first day at Barden High. It would have been so simple to offer to show her around or help her find her way to class, but thanks to Chloe's brief mental break down she had lost that opportunity to Jesse Swanson who seemed to have happily adopted Beca into his odd little crew of music lovers. Now Chloe was stuck trying to figure out the best way to approach the girl who, in two weeks flat, had gained a reputation as an undeniable badass. No one could quite pinpoint what made Beca a bad ass, it's not like she's done a Lily and set the school trash cans on fire, she just…was.

"Okay, for serious Chloe, if you don't stop staring at her then she's going to get a restraining order." Chloe paid little attention to Aubrey's disapproving frown, her observation of the brunette had resumed as soon as Beca went back to her laptop and now she was more concerned with the little crinkle in Beca's brow that appeared when she was concentrating too hard.

"Yeah girl, you need to chill. She probably thinks you want to murder her, not ask her out." Cynthia Rose chimed in, snapping her fingers in front of Chloe's face to get her attention. Some part of CR's words sunk in to Chloe's previously occupied mind.

"Ask her out?" Chloe questioned.

"I figured you'd want to do more than just eye sex her across the room eventually." Chloe looked confused by Cynthia Rose's suggestion.

"Well…yeah, but I thought I'd wait for her to do it." The speed with which Aubrey raised her eyebrow to this was nothing short of impressive.

"Wait for her to do it? Chloe, that was the first time she looked at you just then and even then it was simply coincidence that she happened to see you staring."

"Subtly observing." Chloe grumbled, resenting the stalker like vocabulary her friends were using to describe her nowadays. Aubrey continued anyway.

"I know you're used to people coming to you but you're going to have to ask someone out eventually. Now's a perfect chance." Chloe pondered this….asking Beca out? That just seemed too terrifying to consider, what if she froze again?

"Oooooor, I could try and talk to her a bit more. I wasn't exactly very chatty when we spoke, I don't think I even told her my name."

"Why didn't you tell her your name?"

"I don't know…I guess I got nervous." A quiet hush descended over the table as everyone paused in the action of eating their lunch to look at Chloe.

"You…you got _nervous_?" CR blinked at Chloe.

"Yeah, what's so weird about that?"

"Chloe, you're never nervous about making a new friend. Ever. No matter what the situation." Aubrey stated bluntly.

"Oh that's not true."

"Need I remind you that you introduced yourself to me by telling me I had great boobs while I was trying to change for gym?"

"Well I thought it was a compliment…still don't see why you started blowing a rape whistle at me." Chloe muttered indignantly. Sighing, Aubrey tried to encourage her friend.

"Chloe, if there's one thing I know you can do, it's introduce yourself to someone and strike up a conversation. Just talk to the alt-girl."

"Talk…right, I can do that." Chloe nodded, happily reassuring herself that she was more than capable of small talk.

* * *

"What's up Mmmgefluh?" Chloe froze mid doodle and lifted her head slowly to check she hadn't misheard. Nope, Beca was definitely standing in front of her desk, the ever present smirk on her face making itself known. While Chloe was mentally giving herself a pep talk which quickly turned into a panicked mental breakdown that she still hadn't said anything after an inappropriate amount of time, Beca had started motioning towards the seat next to her. "Mind if I sit here? The only other spare seat is next to some girl named Kimmy Jin and the amount of time she spends glaring at me is starting to freak me out…"

Chloe blinked, this was her opportunity! Mrs Hadwell hated people switching seats once they'd picked one _and_ she liked to get the class to discuss things in their pairs. There'd be so many chances to talk and flirt and…wait, why was Beca walking away?

"Where are you going?" Chloe blurted out, before mentally slapping herself at how desperate she now sounded.

"Um…well, you didn't respond…and you kept staring at me….thought it was your way of telling me to back off…" Beca said, having slowed but still reluctantly inching towards Bumper's desk.

"NO! Uh…I mean….you can sit here. You should sit here. Wouldn't want you to suffer through one of Kimmy Jin's glares. Sit here." Chloe winced at how much she had rambled…screaming 'no' at Beca probably hadn't helped either. Still, the smirk was back in place and Beca appeared to be settling in the seat next to her. Score one for Chloe!

"So you do speak…does this mean I get a name now or should I stick to Mmmgefluh?" Beca teased as she started getting out her books.

"I'm Chloe Beale." It came out a bit shaky but Chloe was still celebrating the fact that she seemed to have finally progressed to actual words that were spoken at an appropriate volume.

"Ahhhhh, you're the infamous Chloe Beale huh? Nice to finally meet you."

"You know me?"

"I think I'm the only one that doesn't, I swear everyone I've spoken to so far has brought up your name at least once. You like to get around don't you?"

"Not sexually!" A bright blush spread fiercely over Chloe's face as soon as the word vomit had come out. "Oh my god, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean that!"

"So you do sleep around then?" If it was possible, Beca's smirk got even bigger as Chloe's eyes widened.

"No! I don't sleep around! I swear! I mean, it's not like I haven't done stuff but…oh god, that make it sound worse! I mean…" Beca let out an amused chuckle as Chloe rambled on and continued to dig a hole for herself. "…not that I'd do that sort of thing anyway but…" Beca cut Chloe off before she could get into the specifics of exactly what she wouldn't do.

"Chloe! Calm down, I was only messing with you."

"Oh…sorry." Chloe smiled sheepishly at Beca.

"Don't worry about it. Trust me, nothing can shock me more that Stacie giving me the 'all the places I've had sex' tour of Barden High…this school has way too many weird little closets incidentally." Chloe giggled at Beca's horrified expression. "Anyway, forgot to introduce myself. I'm Beca Mitchell." Grasping the hand Beca held out to her, Chloe relaxed slightly as she felt herself fall into her element. They were actually talking now, she could do this.

* * *

"I can't do it Aubrey!" Aubrey sighed and shut her economics text book as her best friend slumped in the seat next to her, knowing there was no way she could avoid this conversation.

"Can't what Chloe?"

"I can't make her like me!" Chloe hadn't even looked at Aubrey yet, her gaze was still fixed on Beca, sat several rows in front, no doubt joking with Jesse about another day spent at Barden. Since starting high school, Chloe and her friends had always sat at the very back of the bus, she had never been more grateful for this habit than when Beca had started. It meant she could happily stare at the sarcastic girl from behind.

"What are you talking about? Last week you were happily dancing around because alt-girl said she liked talking to you."

"Yeah, in class! That's all! She hasn't even asked for my number." Chloe grumped. It had been three weeks of fantastically smooth conversation…well, perhaps smooth wasn't quite the right word. Beca seemed to delight in sending Chloe into a gibbering mess and often took the opportunity to do so with her teasing. Now here was the problem, by this point in time Beca should have been trying to seek her out outside of the classroom, asking to sit with her at lunch or seeing if she wanted to hang out, something along those lines. She hadn't though, she stuck to class conversation and didn't seem aware that Chloe existed beyond the walls of their English room.

Chloe was incredibly frustrated by her inability to function properly around Beca Mitchell. Normally she was cool and confident, she controlled the situation and she was the one to leave the other person wanting more. There was something about Beca though, something that turned her into a babbling fool every time she opened her mouth near the short brunette. "As soon as that bell rings, she's hurrying out the class and I'm left wondering why on earth I said half the things I did. The second she's gone, I can figure out exactly what I should've said, but I don't remember the next time she speaks to me."

"Well I'll be damned, little ginger over here has a crush!" Amy's loud outburst caused almost the entire contents of the bus to swivel in their seats and look at them….including Beca. Smiling weakly as Beca flashed her a fantastic grin, Chloe wished she could bury her head in her hands and forget the world, no such luck though. The continued 'aww' sounds and teasing coming from her friends reminded her just how far she'd fallen for Beca in the short while she had known her.

"What do I go guys? How do I get close to her?"

"I know the idea seems preposterous to you Chloe, but have you ever considered just asking her on a date? Maybe she's simply scared to make the first move."

"You're right, I have to do this some time and I don't want to someone else to get there first." The red head said, a new look of fierce determination in her eyes. She turned to the quiet Asian seated next to her. "Lily, how did you ask Donald out?"

"I asked him to go see the exorcist with me."

"Damn, she hates movies, that's out."

"I wasn't talking about the movie."

"….okay, still not doing that. Ugh, why is this so hard?" Lily opened her mouth to speak but Chloe cut her off. "And we're not kidnapping her either."

"Are you sure? I can get you a discount on chloroform."

"Quite sure Lily, thank you." Chloe bit her lip her gaze burned into the back of Beca's head. Aubrey snapped her paper shut at her best friend's antics.

"Look Chloe, it's simple. You have English last on a Friday, just ask if she wants to hang out after school."

"I don't know if she'd even want that though! I have no idea what she's thinking when I look at her...but I want to know, so badly." And just like that, Chloe was back to staring at Beca...well, frowning, she and Jesse seemed to be having a poke war. How did Jesse find it so easy?

* * *

_Come on Chloe, game face on, it's time to do this._

Chloe had been telling herself that exact same sentence for the past fifty three minutes...and the last two Fridays before that. She knew her friends were starting to get irritated with her moping over Beca but this was impossible. It seemed so easy when they were giving her nice, casual invites to use on Beca, but the second she sat next to the brunette, she had to remind herself how to breathe. Asking her out seemed so difficult. Because Chloe had never asked anyone out, she'd never had to face the fear of rejection before and, with Beca, it seemed absolutely crucial that rejection didn't happen. Beca was special.

As Chloe snuck side glances to the girl slumped across the desk next to her, she wished Beca could see her when she was more in control, the better part of her that everyone else saw. Maybe then she'd want Chloe...but she never saw Chloe that way, she only seemed to act stupid around Beca. She wasn't okay with that. Drawing in a deep breath, Chloe let her resolve strengthen. She could do this, she _would _do this.

"Hey Becs?" Steely blue eyes looked sleepily up at Chloe as Beca smiled softly at the red head...which of course caused her to falter just long enough for the bell to ring. Cursing mentally, Chloe joined Beca in packing up their things, smiling shyly as Beca picked up her rubber from the floor and gave it to her. Beca opened her mouth to speak, paused, then closed it again. As Beca began again, Chloe hoped this was Beca finally having worked up the courage to ask her out.

"Want to walk to the bus stop together? I need to quickly go to my locker but I can meet you by the doors?" Dammit, still, this meant she could ask Beca on the way to the bus!

"Sure, sounds great." Chloe beamed, filled with a newfound sense of confidence. She just had to remain stable and not embarrass herself by accidentally calling Beca pretty again. Unfortunately for the bubbly girl, she didn't spot the loud Australian now approaching them.

"Okay, I'll see you in a bit then." Beca smiled at Chloe...which quickly turned to a look of confusion as Amy let out a loud victory cry and punched the air.

"Go ginger! Grew some lady balls and finally did it. Good on ya…and me, Jessica owes me five bucks! Told you she'd say yes!"

"Say yes to what?" Beca asked, eyes flicking back and forth between Amy and Chloe.

"Uhhhhhh...uhhhhh...uhhhhhm" Amy slowly backed away from the now silent pair, continually uming and uhhing till she was out the classroom door.

"Chloe, what's she talking about? What am I saying yes to exactly?" Chloe had never been so interested in the tiles of linoleum that constituted the classroom floor before but suddenly they seemed absolutely fascinating. "Chloe?" Beca's soft tone caused Chloe to lift her head till she was met with the sight of gorgeous grey blue eyes looking at her inquisitively. Well, it was now or never.

"Here's the thing, I kind of sort of maybe have a crush on you and I've been trying to ask you to go on a date with me but I've been finding it really hard because you're so amazing and I've never asked anyone on a date before and-"

"Wait, what?!"

"I'm sorry, I knew you wouldn't be interested. I'll go now." Chloe turned to leave but Beca caught her wrist and turned her back around.

"No, not that…you've seriously never asked anyone out before?" Chloe just shook her head mutely, wishing Beca would let her go so she could go live in the hills as a hermit and never see civilisation again. "Well damn…I was going to ask you if you want to go on a date with me but now there's no way." Chloe's heart plummeted even further knowing she could have had a shot if she just kept her big mouth shut. "You have got to learn to ask someone out, I volunteer myself as test subject." Chloe's eyes widened as she stared at a smiling Beca in front of her.

"W…what?"

"You heard me, ask me out on a date." Chloe blinked at Beca, not quite believing what she was hearing.

"Beca?" Chloe asked cautiously.

"Yes Chloe?" Beca smirked happily back at Chloe, enjoying the red head's nervousness.

"Would you like to go get some coffee with me? As a date?"

"I'd love to." Beca grinned before casually strolling towarss the door. On a high from Beca's response, Chloe reached forward and gently linked their hands together. Raising an eyebrow at Chloe's sudden forwardness, Beca couldn't resist one last tease. "See? That wasn't so hard now was it?"

Years later when they were trying to give their son advice on asking his crush out, Chloe adamantly maintained it was the hardest thing she'd ever had to do.

* * *

_**Thanks to the following for reviewing:**_

Guest 2 - A review and another prompt? You spoil me. =') I'm so glad you like it, first prompt was a success! Woop woop!  
I'll put your hand engraved crown declaring you 'Guest 2' in the post as soon as I can be bothered to leave my bed. (Fair warning, that may not be for a while, my bed is pretty damn comfy=P)

cjba - Dude, I was imagining exactly the same thing. That's why I put in the bit about being a good DJ for when she goes to meet Chloe in the afterlife because, in my head, that's exactly what happened. Thought it might be kind of corny to put something like that in there though =/  
Oh I see, so this is just you using weird advertising mind tricks on me is it? =P

ArcaFeretory - How do I **really**_** know it's you though? Quick! Tell me something only the real ArcaFeretory would know! Except...I have no idea what the real ArcaFeretory know so this is a bit of a moot point...  
Exactly, real friends are the ones who call you on your shit without rubbing it in your face...unless it's a drunk story, then it's mandatory to ;). You persevere, she'll have to discover punctuation eventually =P  
Last week the radio announcer was talking about a strange yellow UFO in the sky...he was talking about the sun, that's what it's like in Britain at the moment. Want to switch? =P My family's favourite is 'Don't You Want Me Baby', we murder that song with gusto ^^  
Out can be nice...sometimes. Never been very big on clubs but I do like a nice pub trip when you can just kick back and have a laugh with your friends over a pint. Can't do that in a pub, too goddamn noisy .  
Well it's good you've got friends you can have a proper conversation with =) I'm not actually out to my parents either. My sister came out as bi and my brother as gay which didn't go amazingly, it could have been a lot worse but their general policy is to ignore it completely except when they want to remind me how wonderful it is that at least they have one straight child who can give them lots of little grandbabies...so, yeah, holding off on telling them for a bit. I know i'm just a random stranger on the internet but if you ever want to talk to someone about it...well, sometime anonymity can be a blessing =)**_

sophiekrop12 - haha, that was actually already on my list of songs I wanted to do but now i'll prioritise it =)

Lackluster Brilliance - *swoons from the flattery* thanks for the kind words dude, especially the 'ermergy fribberty glubbity chugrugertiz', in all my years I have never been given such a compliment =') (Everyone loves a bit of Aubrey, she's ridiculously fun to write)  
You sure about that? I think pretty pervertedly, just saying ;) Cool, now I (sort of) know a sexy psycho killer =P I definitely need to stay on your good side then, I'm bad at making cookies...like, truly awful. I don't know what it is but I ruin them every time =/  
Sounds like you've got it all figured out there, obviously a pretty good system for you =)

anonp - Is this better for you? =) And don't worry, Ellie's response to me getting injured was to punch me and tell me not to do it again because it scared her so besties aren't all great =P

Chloe-Sullivan15 - I'm truly sorry to hear about your story. I'm glad you guys had good times together before she passed and I hope you're doing okay. I lost someone a little while ago and we weren't amazingly close but he was still pretty important to me and it still gets to me sometimes so I can only imagine what you're going through. If you ever need to talk then i'm always willing to lend an ear or whatever you need to feel better. Stay strong yeah?

Question (i'm already running out of these o.O)

Uhhh...what's the best holiday you've ever been on? My closest friends (we call ourselves the awesome foursome...coz we're cool) and I went on a road trip to Cardiff. We spent half our time in a bar that we found that had one pound drinks till eleven and live music and the other half in the doctor's surgery killing time by playing chess and card games because my mate's leg got infected. It was a weird holiday and so many things went wrong but still hands down the best one ever.


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